The other day I was talking to a friend of mine and the topic of discussion changed to "Marriage". This friend of mine is very different from me and he often introduces me to alternative perspectives. The good thing about him is that he doesn't impose his point of view on me (sometimes he does that with other people though). We talk peacefully, he speaks his mind and I speak mine.
I was telling him how much I am scared of getting married to a 'wrong' kind of person. By wrong I meant a person with a personality conflicting to mine. e.g. I like movies and he is a movie-hater. I like to be organized and keep my workplace and home clean and he turns out to be a person enjoying the mess around him. There can be different kinds of mismatches on different levels of personality and I won't name them here. I can't live with and share my life with a person who is so different from me. Actually "different" is not the correct word, "conflicting" is what i mean. I can live and love a person who is very different from me till he doesn't try to change me in order to accept his way of life.
In reply to my worries he said that it doesn't matter at all if you don't connect to your life partner. A bad marriage is not the end of the world. They can still remain happy in their respective worlds, which might include their respective jobs, friend circle and other interests in life.
I think he was talking about an ideal world. I don't think this is possible in the current Indian social system. And may be it is possible for guys, but for a married woman everything is different.
As far as I am concerned I will certainly not be happy in such a situation. I can live with a bad room-mate thinking that she is just a room-mate and that I don't have to live with her forever. But I can't think this way for my life partner. I firmly feel that a marriage can make or break a person. I disagree with my friend.