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Showing posts from April, 2008

Sleep disorder

Of late my schedule has become too erratic. Though it is not the first time this is happening to me, i am really beginning to hate it.


I feel sleepy at all the wrong hours and when it is time to sleep (for normal people) I am wide awake. Last night I went to bed at a good time, which was 11:30 pm. But something was different from all the normal individuals who sleep around that hour everyday. I had taken an anti-allergic pill. Good! The effect was so good that allergy vanished and I slept for around 15-16 hours (believe me).


I have been trying hard to get back the schedule to normal. But it's not happening. So, now something drastic needs to be done.


....I wont sleep till I am dead tired.
....I will not sleep at all if it is beyond 2:00 am.
....Some form of exercise has to happen everyday.


I just hope it works. I am really fed up. :(

Love and Hate

On one of those nights when I was lying on the bed, waiting for sleep to come and embrace me this thought struck me. "Can we love the one we hate and can we hate the one we love?" I kept on thinking and talking to myself and then slept off. The next morning I remembered some points which I pondered over while some were incoherent. But still if I had to find my answer to this question it would be "No".


How one answers this question (don't know whether this question really needs to be answered...) depends on the experiences of their own life. I feel that both "love" and "hatred" are extreme emotions. Anything less than the extreme would have another name but not these. And if I imagine a scale from minus-infinity to plus-infinity, I would label the minus-infinity point as "Hate/Hatred", Zero point as "Indifference or Absence of any emotion" and plus-infinity point as "Love". Normally our emotions fall somewhere in…

Till dreams do us apart...

It has been 3 long years since you left us. Memories of those years spent together, the fights, the badminton matches, or just a stroll around the colony park... I remember all of them. I remember how you looked when we first met and what wrong impression I had of you. It was only after knowing you that I understood what you actually were and why people said the opposite about you. You made an impact on me in those growing years. You were my ideal, you still are.


I remember the moments when you cried for me, sometimes with me. I knew you felt my pain. That's rare.


I remember the last time we met. You were on the way back to Hyderabad, and the train was supposed to go via Kanpur. You insisted that we come to the station to meet you. We came. The train had already arrived. And you were standing on the platform. Tall as you were, I saw you from a distance and waved. You hugged me. For the 10 minutes that we were together, your hands rested on my right shoulder, firmly. And my hand arou…

Neither 'U', nor 'Me'....forget 'Hum'

Directorial debut of Ajay Devgan is disappointing, if nothing else.

I could not emotionally connect to the movie, nor empathize with the lead actors. It seems as if the makers wanted to make something else and because of unknown reasons, the movie turned out to be completely different. In an attempt to convert the movie into a commercial one, a lot of attention was paid on useless things like the cruise-liner. There was absolutely no substance in the movie.

The first half which was supposed to show love blossoming between the couple looked like a bad joke with one corny dialogue after another. When misfortune strikes in the form of Alzheimer's, one hardly feels sorry for the couple. To add to the numbness, the couple's friends irritate the audience like anything. After a few silly jokes and a few drinks, its time to wrap-up the movie and then the whole idea of 'U', 'me' and 'hum' is thrown towards the audience. And before you realize anything else, the mo…

So, how are things?

Yeah, things are okay...moving towards fine...and one day, things will be great. I am not just waiting for that day but have started trying my best to work for it. After a long time, I managed to finish all the jobs I had planned to do in a day (tick marks on my planner say so). Work is happening, but not at a great speed. It will move on gradually. I have still not finished (actually not started) writing the draft of my research paper.I am still avoiding my guide as I have not made the elaborate experiment plan for a period of a month. Morning walks are also not happening. I have to get back to the normal schedule.Room cleaning and decluttering still keeps me happy. Remember this?Reading Amitabha Bagchi's 'Above Average' these days.Have not touched the guitar since i dont know when. The latest excuse is that one of the strings broke.The last of my fishes (and the most lovable one) is dead. I got four new ones today. I have become used to seeing some movement in that corner…