Life's Onward Journey...

...and the year comes to an end!

2011-12-31T03:41:00.001+05:30

I know it would be a cliche if I started this post by saying that I can't believe that the year is already coming to an end. At this point I would quote Geet from the movie Jab We Met, "Please Baba ji, ab to hadd paar ho chuki hai. Ab is raat mein aur koi excitement mat dena. Boring bana do ji ab is raat ko, please!"

If I replace the word "raat" with "saal", it comes very close to my story! :)

This is the year I will hopefully remember as the year I quit mainstream research, though reluctantly, for good. When I look back at each of the troubling episodes, I feel that if I had to relive the past, I would willingly go through all of that to reach the present, that is.

The year began at an uncertain note. The tenure of the last job was about to get over and I didn't have an offer from anywhere else. I could extend my tenure by a couple of months, but I was adamant to leave the organization where I had already spent almost 8 years doing my Ph.D. and post-doctoral research. I needed a major change in life. I decided to go back home and spend some time introspecting. I would not say that it was a good idea but it didn't turn out to be that bad. I relaxed, spent time with family, reinvented some of my hobbies, and bonded with long-lost school friends. However, very soon I was done with all the introspection and it was then that I started to panic.What am I doing with my life? What am I going to do? How long can I sit jobless? These were the questions that started to trickle and then explode out of my head.

The next step was sending grant applications to all the possible research agencies within the country. The aim was to get funding and join the only scientist who was interested in working with me; in other words the only scientist who trusted me and motivated me to keep to this field. With a lot many variables in that equation, apart from the mutual trust between us, the job did not materialize.

In parallel to writing grants, I decided to apply for jobs that somehow matched my qualification and experience. Among all the places that I applied for, I got a positive response from the one I was least interested in joining. However, as I went past tests, telephonic and personal interviews, I started to see the light at the end of the tunnel. When I finally came out of the long, winding tunnel, I saw that I was in Mumbai, once again!

This is the second time that I landed up being in Mumbai, when least expected. The first time was when I got selected at this institute for Ph.D. instead of the sister institute in Bangalore. I remember crying when the final results were declared. I was least excited at the thought of relocating to this big city that extends its arms to the maximum number of migrants every year, much to the chagrin of certain people.

I returned to Mumbai just in time for the monsoons. As the showers began and subsided, and slowly gave way to the winter, which is a misnomer if the city you are talking about is Mumbai, I settled in the new job and its responsibilities. It will not be an exaggeration if I say that slowly I fell in love with it. And, I regained that long-lost passion for doing something creative and productive.

Just when I had almost taken over the job responsibilities completely, I learnt that one of the grants that I had submitted 8 months back got accepted for the next round of evaluation. This could be compared to the return of a lover once you are happy and settled in your married life. But thankfully, it wasn't that bad. I was more amused than sad.

This year, I had my first experience of staying as a paying guest (should be called 'pained guest' instead). The stay was discontinued all of a sudden when a fight broke-up between the land-lady and me. The old friends came to my rescue and allowed me to stay with them for 2 weeks before I shifted to my new place. The highlight of those 2 weeks was the travelling to and from work and my temporary abode which was 30 km away. I enjoyed every bit of it.

Finally, I shifted to a place where I don't have to tolerate the idiosyncrasies and intrusiveness of random people. I have a corner all to myself, in this big-big city.

Life has been kind...and good.

The journey is far from getting over. As we enter into the new year, its newness may or may not mean a thing. To me it is just a milestone that demarcates life into smaller chapters, and an attempt to minimize chaos. Isn't that a reason to celebrate?

Out of nothingness

2011-12-16T02:27:00.000+05:30

The strong smell of its absence is killing me.

Or is it still around?

Seems like it was just yesterday,

that I had put an end to the beginning.

Though the hateful love has slowly begun to stop growing,

a light heaviness is sinisterly creeping.

When my palm craves for the gleaming ray,

My eyes are shut in dismay.

I am losing my breath...

waiting for it to dawn on me.

Come, hold me, blind me...

I dream of a dream

2011-09-12T02:36:00.001+05:30

In a land far-far away, there is this place where you can reach only after climbing up and down a couple of mountains. But once you are there, you know this is where you wanted to be. The valley with flowers down its slope. As the cool breeze caresses you, it brings with it, a mixed scent of the flowers and the moist air; the best way to feel it is with your eyelids shut. You feel the warmth of the winter sun on your toes and hear the sound of birds chirping somewhere, not too near yet not so far. With no hint of human civilization, this is the place I want to be.

I have been thinking about what this dream could mean, since a long time. It is special because this is the first time I have had a recurring dream which has some kind of happiness and a pleasant feeling attached to it. Compared to constantly dreaming of failing in exams, missing a train or a flight, a fire or an earthquake, or worst of all waking up one fine day to find that my hair is as white as snow, this current one is a welcome change.

All the 5 or 6 times that I have dreamt about this, there were small variations. The first couple of times I was able to reach this place where I have been once before (apparently). Rest of the times I just try to reach there but either I lose my way or I wake up. Most of the time I am alone but once I saw that a friend accompanied me and I remember that I was very excited to take her to this place. This dream leaves me perplexed! So much that now I have actually started to look around for such a place. Last night, in my dream I actually booked a ticket for some random destination I don't even remember.

Considering how filmy I am, I would like to dedicate this haunting melodious song to my dream. 'Kya mausam hai'-- written by Majrooh Sultanpuri, composed by Rajesh Roshan and sung by Lata, Rafi, and Kishore Kumar.

Mere Brother Ki Dulhan

2011-09-10T01:39:00.000+05:30

The good news is that both Imran Khan and Katrina Kaif now have 3 and a half expressions compared to a poor 1 and a half at the start of their film careers; and they look great together. That the director has tried to cash on their cuteness-quotient and the eternal monument of love, the Taj Mahal, is very apparent throughout the movie. But apart from some nonsensical sequences and some unpleasant-while-they-last-and-forgettable songs, the movie still manages to entertain and leave a pleasant after taste.

Dimple, a london-born, bidi smoking, law-breaking, 'wild' ex-DU (Delhi Univ.) student succumbs to family pressure and agrees to go for a conventional arranged marriage. During the groom-hunting process she bumps into Kush, a sau-pratishat good boy who neither smokes nor drinks and also believes in family values, who is looking for a dulhan for his settled-in-london brother, Luv. They remember meeting briefly during their DU days when Dimple was a rebel and a rockstar. To believe that, please watch the Dhunki song.

Luv, the brother, who had recently broken up with his steady girl friend he has been dating for the past 5 years requests his brother to find a suitable match for him since he trusts his choice more than their parents'. A testimony of this trust was their common fondness for Madhuri Dixit when they were kids.

The bride's and the groom's family meet. The bride and the groom get to speak on a video-chat, where they play a rapid fire round before saying yes to the alliance. And when everything is set, the bollywood-cupid strikes those who were not supposed to be struck. The song Kaisa ye isq hai, ajab sa risk hai happens next.

By the time the movie reaches the interval, kaafi raaita phail jaata hai. Rest of the movie is about how this raaita is cleared away despite all the twists and turns that come in the way of Kush and Dimple.

Though the movie has quite a few funny moments, I liked those scenes where old bollywood numbers, apt for the particular scene, played from the background and made the situation even more funny. Overall, the movie was a good watch after a busy week.

Bol: Speak out

2011-09-06T01:44:00.000+05:30

It has been a long time since I reviewed a movie. Two movies I really want to write about some day are Dhobi Ghat and Band Baaja Baraat, the only two movies that have impressed me in recent times. But for now I will stick to Bol.

Even though I tried my best not to compare Bol to Khuda Ke Liye, I didn't succeed. There are several commonalities between both these movies and the major one is that both aim at unveiling the evils persisting in the Islamic society. The saddest part is that all this is claimed to be done in the name of God. Even though the story is of a Muslim family in Pakistan, I think the issue is beyond a specific community, language, state or a country. We have our own shame list comprising of female infanticides, khap panchayats, honor killings and many more.

The main protagonist of Bol is Zainab who has been sentenced to death because she killed her father. She is granted her last wish of telling her story to the world before being executed. She speaks about her family which comprised of 7 sisters apart from a mother (child making machine) and a father (man behind the annual child making) and a never ending quest for producing a 'waaris'. With a long queue of daughters in his house, the father, a hakeem, very conveniently blames his wife for all the misery- 'Tumko do hi kaam to theek se aate hain. Ek khaana banaana aur doosra betiyan paida karna.' Zainab being the eldest daughter who could not see her mother's agony, gets her mother operated so that there are no more mouths to feed in the times of dwindling resources. But before that, to add to the misfortune, the mother gives birth to a transgender kid. The kid is disowned by his father who even considered killing him as soon as he was born. He grows up strictly confined to the house, under the love and care of his sisters and mother. After a long dramatic turn of events, the father kills the boy fearing the society and the probable shame that he would bring to the family. And the tragedy doesn't end there.

Through this movie (and Khuda Ke Liye) the director Shoaib Mansoor tries to bring out the sorry state of women in a patriarchal society and how the hypocritical male goes on abusing them in the name of religion. I liked Bol but I think that it became dragging towards the end. Khuda Ke Liye was more effective and had better music. Listen to these songs and decide for yourself. The first one is the title track which basically summarizes the context of the movie and the second one is a sufi song by Baba Bulle Shah, which speaks against the caste divide.

Keep visiting for more reviews in the coming weeks. :)

Mera Anmol Taara

2011-07-12T19:10:00.001+05:30

Ek din,
Jab kuch sochte huye
aasmaan ki taraf sar uthaya,
ek taare ko apni taraf dekhke muskuraata paaya.

Jhund mein bhi akela taara.
Thoda chanchal, thoda gumsum taara.
Mujhe chhedta hua,
mujhse baaten karta taara.

Us din ke baad
main jab bhi akeli hoti,
uski taraf dekh usi se baaten karti.
Pata nahi woh meri awaaz sun bhi raha tha, ya nahi.

Ek din jab haath badha kar use chhoona chaaha,
kho gaya mera taara.
Bahot dhoondne par bhi nahi mila
mera anmol taara.

Bhaari mann se jab sar jhukaya,
zameen par kuch chamakta paaya.
Chhote chhote kaanch jaise tukde
chaaron taraf bikhre huye the.

Ek pal ke baad ehsaas hua,
ki woh kaanch nahi, mere taare ke tukde the.
Jo mujhse milne ke liye, apna ghar chhod aaya tha.
Aur mujhe milne ka sapna tod aaya tha.

Uske tukdon ko apne haathon se sameta.
Aur palat ke aasman ki taraf na dekha dobaara.
Is tarah ek ho gaye,
main aur mera taara.

Gudia humse roothi rahogi

2011-05-09T21:36:00.000+05:30

Dedicated to a friend and some memories.

Voices of the void

2011-05-07T03:42:00.001+05:30

She didn't remember how much time had lapsed since she had thrown away her watch. The ticking of the only other clock in the room ensured that the time moved on. Her back faced the wall that bore that clock while she lay still in her bed with both her arms entwined around her. A sob could be heard every now and then. May be she was tired now. Tired of crying, tired of life, tired of failures and and more than anything, tired of being alone. On any other day it wouldn't have mattered, but today was not any other day. If only there was somebody who had opened the door for her when she came back home a few hours back. Isn't she obscenely selfish if she is longing for another person to spend a bad day with? She had never before felt a similar void.

Then she remembered him.That whole episode of her life came back to her mind out of nowhere and disturbed her even more. Or may be it soothed her. She was confused and that annoyed her.

A glass of cold water was what she needed now. Overcoming inertia had never been tougher. A few moments later she came back and sat at that same spot where she had been lying for close to 4 hours now. Her mind deviated from what troubled her currently to a matter that should not affect her anymore. Is that even worth it, thinking about the past and what could have been? She thought to herself, "Was she still dwelling in the past? Was she still bitter?". She wasn't.

However, she remembered when she had last felt this same void expanding within her- on the night when he was leaving. The night when he sat rummaging through his stuff, searching for something and then repacking, while she sat in a corner of the same room. They had both consented to it. Theoretically speaking it shouldn't have been that painful. But life teaches us lessons when we least expect them. Before leaving he spoke, "I am not afraid that you will be all alone when I am gone, because I believe that I will sense any trouble that approaches you. I will fight it off for you, while you remain oblivious to it. Trust me if you can."

"Where are you today?", she thought. "Why can't you sense that I can't deal with all this anymore? Why don't you come and rescue me now? Can you hear me? How can you not know that I have been crying my eyes out every night before sleeping?"

And then...

"Don't worry I am here. I got a little late this time. You have been managing so well all this while that I thought you didn't need me." She heard him speak.

The next morning as she sat sipping her tea, she wondered, whether she was able to fall asleep after she heard those comforting words or she heard those words after she fell asleep.

Hum Dono

2011-02-10T02:55:00.001+05:30

Jo khatm ho kisi jagah, ye aisa silsila nahi...

I remember that as a kid I used to like Dev Anand a lot. Thanks to the good old days of doordarshan there were re-runs of movies like Tere ghar ke saamne, Kaala Paani, CID, Solva Saal. And then there was the sunday morning Rangoli to catch Dev Sahab romancing Waheeda Rehman in 'Khoya khoya chaand....ho..ho' and crooning 'Tu kahan ye bata is nasheeli raat mein' on the streets. The least I could have done for this old love of mine was to watch 'Hum Dono-Rangeen' in theatre. And I loved it, specially the music.

The movie begins with an almost 4 minute long dialogue-less roothna-manaana scene which culminates in Mohd. Rafi pleading 'Abhi na jaao chhod kar, ki dil abhi bhara nahi'. Lovely. A few more minutes into the movie, the hero shares his lately acquired philosophy of life with us, 'Main zindagi ka saath nibhata chala gaya'.

Jo kho gaya main usko bhulata chala gaya...

And very soon, in the presence of sufficient alcohol in the glass and the system the hero complains, 'Kabhi khud pe kabhi haalaat pe rona aaya'. After all my favorite songs were over, I was completely satiated, not expecting anymore from the movie. It was then that I found a new favorite scene.

As usual the man lands up in a situation which was originally created by his foolishness and then he comes back home and sits quietly holding his head (and probably thinking about his stupidity). The only thing the woman wants is a clear conversation about what is actually happening. Not a word is uttered. The woman pleads more. Then he complains of a headache and says 'Aisa lagta hai ki duniya bhar ke dukh mere sar pe aan gire hain'. In reply to this the woman sings these lines. I had never heard this version before. Simply loved it.

Ki tumse main juda nahi, mujh se tum juda nahi...

Also, this is the only scene in the movie which moved me emotionally. It made me think that probably a similar situation will never arise in my life. Not because my man will never do anything stupid and come back with a headache. But because there will be no man at all. *Sigh*

That's a different story...may be sometime later I will write about it.

Mit gayi dooriyan

2011-02-09T00:18:00.002+05:30

The silsila that I kept going for almost 3 and a half years finally broke 4 months back. I am talking about being faithful to my blog and coming back to it at least once every month, no matter what. Although many hearts (or was it just mine?) and dreams also broke but I will prefer talking about 'sagittalsection' and me.

Dear Blog,

I would be lying if I say that I didn't cheat upon you. I did and I apologize for it. I had a situation-driven-fling with somebody. You know him well. It's that diary I keep hidden in that drawer. I had lied to you when I told you that I had gotten over it and that I had thrown it away. Instead I kept it close to me all this while. And I felt the need to go back to it because there were certain things that I couldn't share with you...and moreover there were some worries that I needed to sort out without troubling you. D gave me the refuge I was craving for. There were times when I shared with it and inflicted pain upon it by tearing away those pages. Like me, D has been through hell. It is a strange relationship I share. D and I have been together for almost 2 decades now. D has seen me grow up from that little school girl to this woman you see today. I am not saying that you and I have shared any less memories. I am just saying I cannot do without either of you.

I won't be able to say the words that you want to hear. Dear B, I cannot be all yours, I need D too. May be it is too much I am asking for. But I hope you understand that I came back to you, because I want you. I need you...just the way you have been, sharing more laughter than tears. I would not deny that our common friends tried to drive me towards you. But it's not after their coaxing that I have come back to you. It's solely my decision. Trust me...

Please take me back. I love you...

Waiting for your reply.

An end-of-the-year-post

2010-12-31T02:32:00.000+05:30

Coming soon....within the next 22 hrs... :)

Companionship

2010-09-23T22:12:00.001+05:30

I realized that of late I have been writing just about movies. Been a long time since I wrote something else.

I have rambled about this 3 years back. At that time I was in a relationship with my room. I remember how I felt at that point of time. It was a phase. I was driven to the confines of my room because I didn't like the company of people.

Today, things are different. I do like people. :)

However, by spending so much time with myself in the last 3 years, I have learnt that for me the search for the most compatible companion begins and ends at the same person. That is myself (this is not intended to sound narcissistic).

I realize that I have become somebody who is a cross between Monica Geller and Sheldon Cooper- A control freak who does not like anything in her room/place to be misplaced by even half a centimetre. One who has a favourite spot to sit down, such that everything is most accessible, including the chair being placed at a perfect angle to the television. I love grouping things and placing them together. Sometime according to the usage, or size, or colour, or my idiosyncrasy. Not everything has a logic or scientific reasoning. I just like it that way. And nobody, I repeat, nobody is supposed to play around with it.

I remember cleaning my mom's dressing table drawers and her cupboards when I was small. I used to dust it, lay fresh paper sheets on the bottom and then keep the stuff arranged as I liked. My mother used to be happy with the cleaning but I remember her asking me why have I arranged her sarees in a particular fashion or about the reallocation of drawers. And I always had an explanation, like this time I have grouped the sarees according to colour, i.e. all shades of red together, or that I have arranged it so that the cotton, silk and chiffons were kept separately, sometimes combining both the criteria to make it more complicated. That was followed by the rearrangement of the cupboard as per my mother's wish. She used to keep her stuff according to their usage. We are a family of freaks. And I am not talking about my brother here. :)

My college notes had a similar story to tell. They were severely colour coded. All the important stuff for long answers used to be marked by a red star, and the ones for short or MCQs were marked with a green tick-mark. Any trivia which was useless for the purpose of exams but seemed interesting to me (like the stories of important discoveries) were scribbled on the other side of the top margin.

'She/He who walks alone, walks fast'. To add to it, 'And turns wherever she/he wants to'. I have become so used to travelling or going for outings alone that when I have company, sometimes I feel constrained. I do not plan going for a movie or going shopping with anybody (there are exceptions to this rule). There is only one person I would pester to accompany me on such occasions. And that one person does not exist. However, in the past I used to drag my friends to some place just because I felt like going. I stopped doing that long back. I remember once I asked a friend to wait for me for almost a week before we could watch a much hyped and awaited movie. He did wait for me, but after the movie he clearly told me not to do this again. Immediately I felt tears welling up and to hide them I laughed out loudly and said 'Of course not.'

It takes so much time and energy to reach that point in a relationship where you don't need to express yourself in words. The other person just understands that by a simple look or gesture. I share that kind of a thing with some of my friends. And whenever that happens, I feel so relieved and blessed. Nothing is more emotionally draining than explaining everything in words. So often there aren't enough words that explain what we feel. I have distanced myself from people and relationships once this load of explaining stuff became more than what I could handle. Such a problem never arises when you have to deal with just yourself. You know what you did, why you did and what you got from it. There is no explaining to be done.

The bottom line is that I have come to this conclusion (as of now) that my comfort zone can be very uncomfortable for most other people. So I should stick to having myself as my sole companion. Everything is fine, except that I miss having an actual conversation. When I am talking to myself I get bored of my own voice vibrating to and fro. :)

P.S. OMG! I am so full of myself. I should stick to writing about movies.

Returned back to you...with love :)

2010-09-14T02:45:00.001+05:30

Aamir Khan at the premiere of 'Dhobhi Ghat' at Toronto International Film Festival

Dabangg-Sallu

2010-09-13T02:47:00.000+05:30

Last year I had sworn that no matter what, I would never again inflict torture upon myself by watching any 'Khan-brothers Production'. But, after hearing about this one from my friends back home I decided to go for it. In a nutshell, I don't regret it. :)

'Dabangg' takes you in that long lost era of Karans, Arjuns, Rams and Lakhans. I am not claiming that those movies were of great cinematic value, but they do have something- a little bit of nostalgia attached to them. A regular sight of heroes in pink tees, heroines in little-black-dresses, dancing away to glory after having tequila shots in posh clubs seems to have bored the audiences a little. 'Dabangg' comes as a welcome change in today's times.

The story is set in a small town somewhere in Uttar Pradesh. Chulbul Pandey is a cop who proudly calls himself Robinhood Pandey aka messiah of the poor. We don't see much of Robinhood-ing happening in the movie except once or twice. Most of the time he is seen chasing a gang of gundas and kick-boxing them every time he catches them. They keep coming back and get beaten up in return. And, so our Chulbul Pandey establishes his dabangg-ness. During one of such chases he lands up at the house of the potter-girl Rajo. Love happens at first sight. But our Chulbul Pandey doesn't try any hanky-panky, instead he proposes to marry her. So, our Chulbul Pandey establishes that he is a man of good character. His life revolves around loving his mother and hating the step-father & step-brother duo. Then there is a sub-plot of some netas and elections, with the bad guys being lead by one Chhedi Singh. Dushmani happens. The mother bears the brunt of it. And in the end, maa-da-ladlaa takes the revenge after joining hands with the step-brother Makkhi.

My heart went out to Chulbul Pandey during one of the scenes when he attempts to patch up with his step-father after his mother's death but is chased away curtly. He takes out his Ray-ban Aviators, wears them and leaves. Once he is out of that room, briefly he takes off the glasses and wipes away his tears, his eyes red and swollen. I felt like hugging him, that very moment. *Sigh*

Watch 'Dabangg' for the never-before dose of Salman Khan. He looks good, acts differently funny, and manages to tear away his shirt solely by his bulging biceps-triceps and don't know what-other-ceps. I clapped and hooted throughout the movie, including the song "Tu atom-bomb hui...darrrling mere liye". :)

Peepli Live

2010-08-15T23:51:00.001+05:30

It is so much easier to write a bad review for a lousy film. Peepli Live left me speechless in the end. I was laughing all through it. But towards the end the tragedy hit me. Surprisingly the audience seemed very sensible. I guess only those who were really interested and curious to know about Natha and the misfortune that struck his family came to the theatres in spite of the city having increasing numbers of swine flu cases.

Peepli Live is the story of a farmer who is compelled to end his life to claim the remuneration from the government to repay the loans and save his piece of land. The way the idea of suicide is planted in his head and the way he becomes the silent spectator of the whole political and media generated hullabaloo is the primary story. The secondary plots comprise of an Amma mouthing choicest gaalis to her Bahu, Natha's wife, the bond between the brothers Budhiya and Natha, the story of a local correspondent of Peepli who wants to make it big in the world of tele-journalism but is sensitive enough to notice the shortcomings of their own job and the stand of the politicians and the leaders of different parties who either want or didn't want Natha to commit suicide for their own selfish reasons.

The movie shows the role of media persons who cover such events and sensationalise it into something which is no where close to the actual problem. The focus gets shifted from the plight of Natha and fellow farmers to the colour of his faeces on the day he disappeared. The fight between the news channels to be the first one to report the most useless bit of information did not seem unreal. We switch to any news channel at any time of the day (apart from prime time) and we see some non-news kind of a report with 'Breaking News' blinking on the bottom of the screen. We all have seen this media madness whether it was Abhishek-Aishwarya wedding or recently Dhoni's wedding where I happened to see the interview of the ghodi-waala. When a kid named Prince fell in a bore-well in Haryaana we were given snippets of news telling us how many biscuits the kid ate in how many hours. Or during the Mumbai terror attacks, the madness seen at the Taj, when one of the reporters actually said that he saw a terrorist escape from the Taj into the city creating more panic. When will the media take their role responsibly?

The farmer Mahto dies quietly in the same village which was the focus of all the news channels, completely unnoticed. Neither did he declare that he was going to die, nor was he the focus of the local politics. Nobody would want to know his story. Another news person dies in the fire accident and is mistaken to be Natha. Natha's family does not get the remuneration because he didn't kill himself but died in an accident. And poor Natha runs away to save his life while his widow and children stay in a situation not very different from before, may be even worse. Really sad.

I liked the the Des Mera and the Mehngai daayan songs . Earlier I have seen people hooting and whistling at Chayyan chayyan and All iz well, but the kind of response the Mehngai song had in the theatre was amazing. May be because it is Bhubaneswar and not Mumbai. I enjoyed it. But some of the songs towards the end of the movie were a little loud and I felt that they didn't go well with the theme of the movie. Anusha Rizvi the debutante director did a good job. I hope she makes more meaningful cinema in future. The producer did his best at promoting the movie. May be it was brand Aamir Khan that helped create an awareness for this movie. The price Rizvi paid for it was that she didn't get to speak much about the movie. That's ok. The movie speaks for itself. Must watch.

Aisha

2010-08-09T01:11:00.000+05:30

A story-less fashion parade. And what a waste of Abhay Deol.

However, I must stay that all the actors specially Sonam Kapoor were very stylishly presented (except one or two hair-dos). The movie is a pretty collage of trendy dresses, flowers and accessories. It would have been better if 'Aisha' was a coffee table book instead of a movie. Really. The story could have been wrapped up in less than 90 mins. There was no need of a Dhruv or Aarti (or Anita...i don't remember) to add to the length of the movie.

Sonam Kapoor is capable of showing only two expressions, :) and :(. And juggles between these two throughout. In all scenes when she is with her friends she is like :) and whenever Abhay Deol, her major critic, is in the vicinity she goes :(. And this keeps on happening till the end. At the end of the movie we know who Aisha is but we don't know why she is the way she is. The audience doesn't get access to the head of this character on which the whole movie is based. I remember reading Jane Austen's Emma in school but I don't remember anything of it. Will try to grab it.

Firstly Abhay Deol does so few movies and then he appears in dumb ones like this. I want more of him. Waiting for 'Zindagi Na Milegi Dobaara'. It has my second heartthrob Farhan Akhtar too apart from AD who is a close third. :)

Oh yes...I did like a few things in Aisha. That lavender-theme wedding party was a treat to my eyes. I love that colour. At least one room in my future house (or at least a corner of a room) will have everything in shades of lavender/mauve/lilac. I have already collected a few items. :)

And I liked the song 'Gal mitthi mitthi bol'. The video is cute, specially the way Abhay Deol danced. He is the best Deol to come out of that fist-clenching-jaw-breaking family. Thank God for it!

Jungle hai aadhi raat hai...lagne laga hai darr

2010-08-05T22:44:00.000+05:30

Remember this?

I am back in the land where Ashoka embraced Buddhism after killing thousands. I am not sure whether I will embrace Buddhism but i might end up killing a thousands. Not people, but bugs.

The first time I took bath, marked the end of life of a cockroach and a couple of ants and spiders. This year I am more prepared. :)

The room in which I am staying is adjacent to the one stayed in last year. So, I get to use the same bathroom. It made me feel at home. I even found the remains of the agarbattis I had lit last year. Who else would light agarbattis in bathroom?

The moment I got down the train on sunday morning, I was shocked by the grand welcome provided by two of my friends here. Within 30 seconds of touching the grounds, a coconut was cracked at my feet and then there were garlands... (I swear that happened!). And it left me speechless and embarrassed. Very sweet of them.

The city looks the same. Just that this time I am not feeling lost here. I know where to go to buy stuff and where to roam around. Actually I am feeling good here. Except that I am missing my friends back in Mumbai...some of them won't be around when I get back . I keep thinking of you :(

The institute where I am working has restricted access to all social networking sites and any other sites which carry the term 'Blog'. After suffering for 5 days I managed to get a net connection of my own. And I am back. Will keep posting my adventures from this corner of India.

It's raining like hell here. And I am not liking it.

Dichotomy

2010-07-17T03:17:00.000+05:30

Life is what lies between these two songs.

I (don't) hate luv storys

2010-07-03T03:45:00.000+05:30

I liked this one. :)

Going to the theater with lowered expectations has become routine now. And after disappointments such as Kites, Raavan, and Rajneeti (second half) I am trying to adjust an even lower expectation level. But I think I would have liked I hate love storys even otherwise.

It's a sweet movie which will appeal to all the young college going crowd and a few older ones who are still young (and stupid) at heart (guess who? :-)). I am not saying it is an intelligent movie with out of the world performances. It was just 'sweet', if you know what I am talking about.

The movie is about 'love' as depicted in various 'love stories' and the effect it has on the working of all those human minds which dwell on them. Some of these minds end up concocting their own real life stories (which in reality do not exist). A couple of these minds concoct their love stories, and happen to stumble upon their respective Rajs and Simrans, who also have the same stories in their minds (What is the probability of such an event happening?). Here in this movie Simran is in love with the idea of love and has already found her Raj in her childhood-friend-turned-fiance. Then she gets to meet Jay (or J) and suddenly Raj becomes boring and cliched. To me Raj's character seemed like an extension of that guy in Dil Chahta Hai whom Sonali Kulkarni was dating before she met Saif. So, after Simran realizes that she is in love with Jay instead of her perfect Raj, she shares her feelings with Jay who doesn't react in the way she expected. Then after a lot of "idhar-udhar-ki baatein" and "waghaira-waghaira" finally Jay accepts that even a casanova like him had developed feelings for Simran. And then they hug and live happily ever after.

Whole of this Simran-Jay love story happens on the sets of another routine Bollywood love story, called Pyaar Pyaar Pyaar (how imaginative) where they work as art director and assistant director respectively. This Pyaar Pyaar Pyaar was Dilwaale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge meets Kuch Kuch Hota Hai meets Dil Chahta Hai meets Mohabbatein meets Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam etc etc. These spoofs and some of the one liners are the strengths of this movie. Now I don't know how many of those one-liners were original because I identified some of them (and some scenes too) lifted straight from the sitcom How I Met Your Mother. I won't be happy with anybody trying to imitate Barney Stinson. He is 'legen (wait for it)....dary'. :)

P.S. Barney Stinson shall be revisited on this blog very soon.

Raajneeti

2010-06-05T05:17:00.000+05:30

I have not seen a better first half than that of 'Rajneeti' in ages. The movie till the intermission showed a lot of promise and raised the expectations from the second half. But in the second half the story-writer/director ran out of ideas and started killing the characters just to pave the way for the most suitable future chief minister of the state. I think it would have been better if 'Rajneeti' was based on underworld because the killings (in the name of gang-war) would have fitted well with the story. None of the characters (including the aspiring CMs and party workers) showed any concern for the state or the country, while throughout the movie 'Vande Mataram' played in the background.

The main story of the movie is borrowed from Mario Puzo's Godfather and the Mahabharata. There are also some minor resemblances to the life of the Gandhis (Rajiv, Sanjay, Soniya) and the movie 'Viraasat' (or the original 'Thevar Magan'). The worst scene of the movie is the one when the mother (like Kunti of Mahabharata) meets her illegitimate son (Karna) and asks him to come back to the family he belongs to. Highly cliched. By the time this situation arises in the movie, the audience (which is not dumb) has understood that they are watching a revamped version of the epic. It would have been a challenging task for the director to modify this scene by using some creative imagination. So, instead of that he used the usual "tum mere jyeshtha putra ho, beta" (Ok, nobody uses this language now) and "ghar aa jao, beta" and "gaddi sambhal lo, beta". Disappointing.

There is this main character in the movie who is a part of the political family but does not share the interest in politics and instead is a researcher planning to become a professor. He gets involved in the whole ganda rajneeti because of the sudden turn of events and ends up killing a bunch of people. Then finally in the end when apparently everything is fine, he is shown leaving for US of A. Before leaving the country for good he says that politics brings out the animal in people and he is basically not bad. Waah!!! Very conveniently after making a fool of the whole police department (am i expecting a lot from the police?) he leaves the country. And who drives him to the airport? The poor driver who was also the father of one of the people this man killed. I was almost expecting one more murder on the way to the airport. But I guess that does not happen.

Ok I tried a lot but cannot resist writing here that I was talking about Ranbir Kapoor. :)
Jokes apart, he has acted really well in the movie. Actually one should watch Rajneeti just for the acting. All of them Nana Patekar, Manoj Bajpai, Arjun Rampal (who speaks in a faintly Bihari accent when everybody else speaks like a UP-waala), Ajay Devgan, Ranbir Kapoor and Katrina Kaif (quite tolerable in this movie) have done a good job. Please don't go to the theaters expecting to watch Naseeruddin Shah. Apart from what is shown in the trailers he is there in just one more scene. He plays the role of Surya Devta which was essential for the existence of Karna.

In the end I wish Arjun Rampal's character was more positive. The kind of gunda language he uses in the movie doesn't suit him at all. He is better suited for gentlemanly kind of roles. And he is the perfect eye candy. :)

It's my turn now

2010-06-02T21:14:00.002+05:30

In the last one month when almost everybody around me fell sick, took antibiotics and recovered I was genuinely feeling left out. I told my friends too, "Why not me?" This is not normal. Every time any new virus-on-prowl catches me first and then gets passed on to anybody else. It has been like this since forever.

But, better late than never. It has struck me, finally. That tells me that my system is working fine. :)

Come on cells, attack the invader, don't let it escape. I can feel the action with the swollen tonsils and pyrexia. You all have rested for almost a year. Don't be lazy now. Get going. I need you.

How I saw 'Lagaan'

2010-05-31T00:21:00.000+05:30

"When can I submit my answer sheet?" I asked the invigilator in the examination hall. First he gave me a look as if saying "I can see on your stupid face that you don't know anything and will never qualify this exam". Finally after a pause he said "Not before 11:00 hrs, madam". It was just 10:25 and that meant I had to wait for full 35 mins. I decided to flip through the question paper and recheck all the answers I had marked. Then I looked at the watch and it said 10:45. The thought ran through my mind "Oh my God! How will I get the tickets?"

I was in Aligarh on that day, which was 21st or 22nd June 2001, the release date of 'Lagaan'. The reason for my being in Aligarh was the All India Entrance Examination for M.Sc. (Biotechnology). Giving company to me was my poor brother who was sitting somewhere in the University campus while I was answering and re-answering the question paper. I had full confidence that no matter how well I do that exam, I would never get through. I just knew that. So, before entering the exam hall I gave instructions to my brother to buy a local newspaper and check the show-timings of Lagaan in all nearby theatres.

Somehow I managed to escape from the exam hall after throwing the damn paper on the invigilator's desk. The next memory I have is that both my brother and I are on a rickshaw, rushing towards some theatre. The first show was at 11:45. I could not believe I was going to watch the premiere show of 'Lagaan'. :)

We reached the theater just on time. Instead of having lunch, we grabbed some samosas or sandwich (I don't remember correctly). And then it began... Every moment was fun. Actually even more fun because the crowd was very rowdy. The theater was full of Aligarh-based lafangaas. Wali even whispered in my ears, "Aapi shayad tum akeli ladki ho is hall mein is waqt". "Arey kya farq padta hai. Picture dekho yaar", I replied.

But before it could end we had to leave because we had to rush to the station to catch a train for Lucknow. Wali was more stressed than me. He kept on nudging me, "Aapi chalo, train ka time ho gaya hai". "Don't you understand that I cannot leave the seat before watching the last day of the match", I felt like telling him. "May be the train is late", the thought crossed my mind. "Or may be not.", I thought. Ammi Abbu would kill both of us if we miss the train because of a movie. This final thought made me get up from the seat very reluctantly. I looked back at the screen one last time. "O Paalanhaare..." had just started. "Let Bhuvan's team win, God", I prayed and left.

We were able to catch Gomti express and return home on time. Previously we had decided that we won't tell our parents that we watched the movie. But we could not do that. We convinced them that all of us have to watch it in the theatre again. After less than a week, the four of us watched the movie again at 'Pratibha'.

And, Bhuvan's team won!

P.S. I liked the last bit of narration in Amitabh Bachchan's voice- "Elizabeth apne mann mein Bhuvan ki moorat le kar England waapas chali gayi aur saara jeevan avivahit reh kar Bhuvan ki Radha bani".
and
"Is aitehaasik jeet ke baad bhi Bhuvan ka naam itihaas ke panno mein kaheen kho gaya".
(Only to be revived by Ashutosh Gowariker)
:)

(I guess I will have to write a separate detailed post only about Bhuvan, one of my favourite characters)

Kati patang

2010-05-21T02:51:00.000+05:30

Even before watching 'Kites' I had thought of this title for my blog post. I am happy I didn't have to think of a new title after the end credits started rolling.

The question which kept coming back to my head every 5-10 mins was "WHY???"

Spoilers Ahead!

An Indian man making money by all wrong means in Las Vegas with dreams of hitting the jackpot someday. His prayers are answered when the daughter of a millionaire (or a billionaire) falls for him and he pretends to reciprocate. Only till he finds 'love' in the fiance of his girl-friend's brother (It's complicated!!!). And why do they still call it 'love'??? Anyway... they had no other choice but to elope. And there begins a long chase in train, cars, trucks, lorries, motorbike, and even a hot-air balloon. At the end of this whole chase half of the policemen of the Las Vegas Police Department and the Indo-Mexican couple is dead. And then comes the part which always irritates me....the souls of the dead lovers uniting!!!

Kites is full of cliches. e.g. "I don't know which part of the world you belong to, but you have become my world now". "You have painted my life which was black and white before I met you". In my head, all this is equivalent to "Main tumhare liye asmaan se chaand taare bhi tod ke la sakta hoon". (Gives me a headache)

About Hrithik Roshan... I am not sure whether he overacts or he puts in so much effort to express a simple emotion that it looks like overacting. Yes, he looks good, dances well, but that is all. (Lakshya was an exception).

O mere jeevan saathi...

2010-05-19T22:42:00.000+05:30

Lakh mana le duniya, saath na ye chhootega
Aa ke mere haathon mein, haath na ye chhootega

Dedicated to the one I love

2010-05-16T23:26:00.000+05:30

...But I can't help falling in love with you

Wise men say, only fools rush in.
But I can't help falling in love with you.

Shall I stay? Would it be a sin?
If I can't help falling in love with you.

Like a river flows, surely to the sea,
Darling so it goes, somethings are meant to be.

Take my hand, take my whole life too,
For I can't help falling in love with you.

Ajmal Kasab's death sentence and Indian Muslims

2010-05-11T00:55:00.000+05:30

Finally the judgment is out. The man was proven guilty of murder of more than 50 people on the ill fated night of 26th Nov 2008. That was the least which he deserved.

The next morning when I picked up the newspaper from the door step I could not help but notice the subtleties in the picture on the front page. It showed muslim men celebrating the verdict. It seemed to me a deliberate attempt to showcase to the country (and to the world) the patriotism of an average Indian Muslim. I have been wondering about the reasons why this needs to be done.

Then, today I stumbled upon this article "Why can't Rahim behave like Ram or Robert?"

It speaks out some of my thoughts.

Hardly wonderful

2010-05-08T19:02:00.000+05:30

(A quick post for the sake of humanity)

I have never seen such a crap in the name of India and Indian wedding before.

Stay away from this one if you love yourself.

P.S. The only tolerable thing about this movie is Sendhil Ramamurthy.

Long pending post

2010-04-02T05:39:00.000+05:30

This post has been caged in the 'drafts' folder forever now. Finally I am letting it free with a compromise that I won't be able to discuss each of these movies in detail. That is because of my laziness and also because I don't remember all that I wanted to write initially. Most of the stuff which I write in my posts reviewing movies are thoughts that come in my head while coming back from the movie theater. I try wording the beginning and the end of the post and the points to highlight in between. It has become a habit now. I did that each of the time I went for a movie in the last one month but those lines died in my head eventually. But since movies are what I eat and drink, I am trying to fish out some of those thoughts (for the betterment of humanity) and posting them in this long-ish post.

Well Done Abba

I would not have seen Shyam Benegal's 'Well Done Abba' if I wasn't emotionally blackmailed by a friend last friday. And I am glad I did. It is a very simple story of a common man who falls prey to bureaucracy and how he fights back with the same system almost lawfully and gets the 'well' and the 'well-done'. The interesting point is that the movie is in the form of story-telling and in the end it is unclear whether the events actually took place or were figment of the man's imagination to get his job back. Nevertheless, it is a well made movie with Boman Irani and Minnisha Lamba being the main cast. It was a refreshing change to hear the protagonists speaking hyderabadi urdu. . And the irritating part was the guaranteed dose of overacting from Boman Irani (not the main protagonist but his twin brother). A nice watchable movie.

LSD

Another movie which I had initially decided not to watch because of negative reviews I got from those around me was 'LSD'. This one is yet another experiment with movie-making in recent times which I liked. Almost all the characters and the situations seemed real. The really tough part while making this movie would have been the camera movements. It is easier to keep the camera steady and shoot than to use weird angles of shooting apparently from hidden cameras from broaches to bags to lockets. There are several scenes in the movie which moved me. One of those being the shock with which Rashmi speaks about her friend's death. The camera in this scene is stationed behind her and at no point can we see her face. The expression in her voice was sufficient to give me goose bumps. And I liked the way the 3 stories were intertwined. In each of the stories the perspective with which we see all the other characters is different as is the camera angle. Amazing.

The Band's Visit

"Once not long ago a small Egyptian police band arrived in Israel. Not many remember this...it wasn't that important."

One of the many reasons why I consider myself privileged to be working at this institute is because of the kind of exposure we get here in the field of Science as well as Art. Bikur Ha-Tizmoret or The Band's Visit was screened here last saturday. It's one of the best movies I have ever seen. The strength of this kind of cinema lies in the fact that human emotions know no boundaries of countries, continents or languages. The movie tells us the story of an Egyptian Police Band that is compelled to spend a night at Bet Hatikva, a small town in Israel, while they were actually supposed to go to Petah Tikvah, a different town. Each of the band members spend the night in a different manner talking to or spending time with the friendly and some not so friendly locals. Nothing extraordinary happens, which is the way life is. The band members take a leave the next morning leaving memories behind and carrying some, without any promises to return. Sweet and sad. :(

Ismat Aapa Ke Naam

After months of reading the name of this play in the newspapers, finally I got to watch it at the institute itself on the occasion of International Women's Day. The play comprised of 3 different stories written by Ismat Chughtai, Amar bel, Nanhi ki Naani and Do Haath. Each of the stories were enacted by 3 different actors in an interesting way of story-telling, where the story is read as it is with the single actor enacting the parts of all the characters and being the narrator in between. Listening to Urdu is such a treat. I hardly get to hear or read it now. I would like to improve my urdu someday by reading more classic literature. Don't know when it's going to happen though.

Atithi Tum Kab Jaoge

This is the worse movie I saw in recent times and it will be waste of time and space if I write more about it. I went to watch this one for two simple reasons, Konkona Sen-Sharma and caramel popcorn. At least I enjoyed the 10 minutes while I was munching the corn.

Harishchandrachi Factory

I would have completely missed this movie if it wasn't screened at the institute itself. Lovely movie which narrates the incidents which preceded the making of first Hindi Talkie "Raja Harishchandra". At least now people will recognize the contribution of Dada Sahab Phalke to the Indian Film Industry. If it wasn't him then anybody else would have achieved the same. But that person, not necessarily, would have had the same passion for cinema and entertaining the masses as Dhundiraj Govind Phalke.

It's Complicated

It's Complicated is a funny movie where a remarried ex-husband has an affair with his estranged-yet-single wife. Nothing great about it apart from a few laughs at some really funny incidences. The not so funny truth was that the husband managed to cheat on both his wives with them being oblivious to it. Men!!!!

Karthik Calling Karthik

This one disappointed me to a great degree. May be I was expecting a lot from this Farhan Akhtar starrer (I still love him though). But the last 30 minutes or so were complete 'paisa vasool' for me. I was using my head to crack the mystery all through the first half and when it was revealed.... I felt like "Aha...!" There were some other scenes in the movie which I liked a lot but I can't remember now. One of them was the super-romantic setting of their first coffee date. I would be thrilled if somebody does that to me (take the hint, guys!!!). :)

But after that kind of a first date please don't come and tell me that you talk to yourself over the phone every morning. That will be spooky!

Up In the Air

I really liked this one. Honestly I have started getting attracted to grey-haired men. George Clooney is HOT. I loved his character Ryan Bingham who apart from firing people also lectures them on how to travel-light. At one point of time he meets a woman who seems like him and makes him stray from his principle of living life without any kind of attachment or commitment. But things turn out to be different in her case. And life gets back to normal for Mr Bingham once again.

I got reminded of how much I love travelling by train. And I don't know the words travel-light. My pillow, bed sheets, book, diary, and million other things find a place (or adjust) in my baggage. When I am traveling I consider that seat as my temporary home and in order to enjoy every bit of my journey I keep all these things handy. I would have killed Mr. Bingham if he threw my pillow in the dust bin as in the movie.

With this I end this post. Phew!!!

Haze, Clarity and Trust

2010-03-25T04:29:00.002+05:30

The domineering moon masks the faint stars which are very much there. Sometimes it's not the moon, but the thick grey clouds. Still their presence cannot be negated. They are just not visible, but they are shining out there.

It takes a clear moonless night to witness their glory.

And it takes unshakable trust to feel their presence even when they are hidden from the eyes.

And for this kind of trust to form, it takes a few dark and lonely nights.

Graduation

2010-02-27T02:59:00.002+05:30

It finally got over earlier today. The feeling has not sunk in yet. Actually my mind is completely numb after the high level stress it had to deal with. Will write more once I start feeling something.

My Name is Khan

2010-02-13T01:57:00.004+05:30

This is the closest Karan Johar ever came (or will come, may be) to the so-called meaningful cinema. And I think he deserves an applause, specially for not making Kajol (in flowing dupatta or chiffon sari) and Shahrukh Khan (in that signature pose of his) dance to a romantic melody in a dream sequence.

I managed to watch the movie in spite of the hullabaloo surrounding its release. Actually I had booked the tickets in advance thinking everything will eventually calm down. Till I reached the theater I wasn't sure whether the show was on or cancelled. The situation was completely under control with the police and media persons surrounding the theater and there was no sign of any hungama. Thank God.

I am not an ardent SRK fan (except that I really liked him in Swades and Chak De). In the past few years we saw him giving average performances in Om Shanti Om, Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi and Billu. So, this time too I sat in front of three big screen with almost zero expectation. Now I don't know if I liked 'My Name is Khan' because I didn't expect anything great from it or because it is a great movie.

It is a story of a man who suffers from Asperger's syndrome which is characterized by impaired social interaction skills. A man who was taught by his mother that there are just two kinds of people in the world- good and bad. A man who knew and felt but could not express. A man who meekly asked his wife "Mandira, main waapas kab aaoon" when she asks him to go away and leave her alone. Every word she said in answer to this question became his life. Not being aware of what he was doing, he gets caught in unfortunate circumstances, but keeps moving. And as always, in the end he succeeds. Two college kids who take up studying Khan's case for a project, an influential Sikh journalist, who was compelled to let go of his turban and hair because of the increased attacks on Sikhs post-9/11 and an African-American family comprising of Mamma Jenny and funny-hair-Joel were some of the people who helped Khan during his journey.

I will not say that this was Shahrukh Khan's best performance so far. I think Swades and Chak De were far better. But this one was surely one of his better performances. Kajol was great always. When I saw Kajol in Fanaa I thought she can never look more beautiful. I was wrong. She didn't have much of screen space in the second half of the movie, and I kept hoping to see more of her. The only negative point of the movie was the excess of drama element towards the end. But thankfully it didn't get on my nerves.

We get a taste of Khan's forthrightness because of his medical condition at several points during the movie. When he was asked which Church he belonged to at a Christian charity event for drought afflicted Africans, he replied after giving the 500 dollars, "Keep this for those who are not Christians in Africa". At another instance he scribbled in his diary after being tortured in the prison, "I think these people are angry with me because I don't know anything about Al-Qaeda. I should have read about it earlier".

Overall, MNIK didn't disappoint me at all. And I have been humming "Noor-e-Khuda" since that day. All the three singers Shanker Mahadevan, Adnan Sami and Shreya Ghoshal have sung this song really well. I like Shreya Ghoshal's part the most.

Ujde se lamhon ko aas teri,
Zakhmi dilon ko hai pyaas teri,
Har dhadkan ko talash teri,
Tera milta nahi hai pata.
Noor-e-Khuda Noor-e-Khuda,
Tu kahan chhupa hai humen ye bata,
Kya ye sach hai ke tu hai humse khafa...

Racial divides, discrimination based on religion, region, language and sex exists in today's world. If only people could think of more ways towards unification rather than finding reasons for exclusion.

Astro revealations

2010-01-24T04:04:00.002+05:30

My last week's astrological forecast said that everything on job-front (and other fronts) will take a U-turn and be perfectly fine sometime very soon. I smiled. Then I read the forecasts for other sun-signs and as expected something or the other matched with almost all of them. I smiled again. :)

Stepping back

2010-01-23T01:56:00.003+05:30

Picture courtesy: http://www.crosswindschurch.net/images/footsteps.jpg

Is it possible to just take a few steps back and undo the hundred steps I walked thinking it was the right direction...

Sea face

2010-01-15T19:13:00.004+05:30

Feels good to be back. Amongst many other things which were on my "Must do while in Bombay" list , taking a stroll at the sea face came first. I missed doing that so much. Evenings there were spent in having tea at a road-side dhaba along with some pakodas. That used to be my daily getaway from the lab. There was no place where I could just take a walk without million other people staring at my face.

In the last many years, a walk at the sea-face (either alone or with a buddy) or a long chat sitting on the rocks has helped me in regaining my sanity on many stressful and frustrating days. I was eagerly waiting to get the same feeling. And I did. The rocks and the waves crashing against them seemed the same. And talking to those friends after more than a year (2 and a half years in case of one) also felt the same. I am happy.

Picture courtesy: Pavitra

Between 'Arrival' and 'Departure'

2010-01-10T22:31:00.003+05:30

From welcome hugs to good-bye kisses. From counting days before arrival to counting minutes remaining before departure. In the race between us and time, the latter has always won. It arrives punctually before us, thus shortening the moments between 'arrival' and 'departure'.

What stays back are new memories in a new chapter of life, ending at "...to be continued (hopefully)".

Aal izz well !!!

2009-12-26T16:34:00.009+05:30

Life to hai hi out of control,
Aur dimag to bachpan se hai 'gol' (read zero).
Ab ye kehte hain ki hothon ko kar ke gol,
Seeti baja ke bol.... Aal izz well.

Ye bhi karke dekh lete hain... :)

Spent a really stressful day yesterday. First half of the day was spent in worrying whether I will get the ticket for the first-day-any-show of my hero's movie. Second half was spent in processing 10 blood samples and painting the white blood cells with four different colours, first on the outside and then inside. Was able to do everything except remembering that it was Christmas. :(

Serves me right. Will wait for 25th Dec 2010 now.

In between the two kind of stresses I spent some 3 hours with the 3 Idiots. And every minute was worth it. It took me back in time, to school and college days, the good old days of exams...sorry not so good days of exams. I remembered how I could never cram, how I could never write more than a page or two in response to essay type questions, how I failed to use flowery language for describing something simple in science exams (it's ok to show your language skills in literature but why science?). I remembered this friend of mine who lost his life to constant pressure to crack IIT-JEE. And even before that scene in the movie, I had already started crying. I knew something wrong was going to happen...

3 idiots, the movie, had slight resemblance to both Munnabhai MBBS and Taare Zameen Par. It was clear that it was born out of the merger of two brains Hirani-Khan. Remember the scene when Munna asks the teachers some basic questions and in return leaving them flustered? And remember that scene when the hindi teacher asks Ishaan Awasthi to explain a 'kavita'?

The best thing about 3 idiots is that it does both, conveys a message to the public and entertains them, without compromising on either. Of course there are flaws, but I won't mention them because I don't want to reveal anything about the movie.

All of us would have met a Chatur, or a Suhas, or a ViruS in our lives. We think we could have done without them, but it is people like them who make you look back at the past and share a laughter with your Farhans and Rajus. I have met not one but many Ranchos, who have taught me to live and be happy. I wish I was Rancho too. But then who would play the role of Farhan and Raju? They are important too :)

I have been singing "Aal izz well..." since yesterday. And "Saari umr hum, mar mar ke jee liye, ab to ek pal jeene do...". And "Behti hawa sa tha woh...". And "Zoobi doobi...". Oh! That includes almost all the songs.

Strive for excellence and success will automatically come to you (jhak maar ke). This seems to be the formula of Aamir Khan. I love him. :)

Remembering Heisenberg

2009-11-23T13:51:00.004+05:30

Dear Heisenberg,

You will be delighted to know that your 'Uncertainty Principle' of quantum mechanics can be applied in other scenarios as well. One of those is the state of scientific research at many of the institutes in this country. Research being a group activity there are people involved at different steps, e.g. administrative staff, purchase and store staff, technicians, clinical or other collaborators, the principal investigator and the graduate students. Apart from the general scientific temper and aptitude, often the graduate students are expected to coordinated with all the above mentioned staff and people for the smooth working of the system at least till the time they graduate. There is always at least one student in this weird hierarchical setup (in which each and every person has the capability of being the rate-limiting step) who drives the system.

I was very fortunate to do my Ph.D. from an institute where the system was relatively more organized. But being at this current place is becoming frustrating with every passing day.

My work depends on two people at the distant clinical collaborative setup and the patients (there are many). These two people are supposed to work together for ~3 hrs twice every week to get samples for me. Week after week I am given novel reasons for unavailability of either of them. I can tolerate reasons like one of them being busy with examination/interview. But it is really irritating to find out that one of them is playing the role of a handyman to his immediate boss, doing odd jobs at the market, standing in the queue at some ticket counter, performing puja at a funeral and may be buying vegetables for them too. I fail to predict his exact location or his velocity/momentum at any moment. There comes the uncertainty of his availability and completion of my work here. The only thing which remains certain is that the monthly salaries of all the people involved (except me) is deposited in their accounts on the 1st of every month, whereas I have to make million calls to ask for the status of my fellowship. How unfair....

Tum pukar lo

2009-11-17T19:22:00.003+05:30

Waheeda Rehman climbs up the stairs holding a book (Meghdoot) in her hands as Dharmendra croons this haunting melody. The song ends as the lady climbs down the stairs and the man remains oblivious of her presence.

A song so simple, yet meaningful. A perfect song for a lonely, breezy night.

Somehow, whenever I listen to these lines "...dil behel to jayega is khayal se, haal mil gaya tumhara apne haal se" I feel that they describe a smaller degree of sadistic-pleasure. :)

Love this song.

It's that time of the year.... :)

2009-11-16T21:06:00.003+05:30

Waiting for 25th December 2009.

Been a year since I fought and snatched tickets from the rowdy telugu crowd in Hyderabad and managed to watch the first-day-second-show of Ghajini.

Been two years since I pestered my lab junior to get tickets for TZP while I was giving a presentation on my research in Pune.

Been three years since I got a chance to be the lucky one to get the last ticket for the preview show of Rang De Basanti.

Been many many years...since this silsila of craziness has been going on....and it will go on forever.

Love of my life (of 20 years)....here i come. :)

Ajab & Ghazab

2009-11-07T18:44:00.002+05:30

What was the first thing which made me rush and watch the first-day-first-show of this movie? It was the fun-factor which is quite evident from the official website of APKGK (http://www.ajabpremkighazabkahani.tips.in/). The other interesting features were the songs (i love most of them).

The story is of a good-for-nothing boy (and his equally worthless friends) who promises his mother that one day he will do something great and make her proud. There are many sub-plots in his way to fame. And of what value is fame if you don't have the love of your life by your side by the end of the story? Prem succeeds in achieving everything (like in most hindi movies).

I got slightly bored with all the slap-stick comedy in the first 15-20 mins. But slowly the movie got interesting. May be I liked this movie so much because I really wanted to like it as it reminded me of those good old movies Andaz Apna Apna, Jo Jeeta Wohi Sikander and Kabhi Haan Kabhi Na. Amongst them the resemblance to Andaz Apna Apna was most obvious (with Ello ji sanam hum aa gaye playing in background in of the scenes) , specially the climax which was shot in a detergent factory. The villain would remind you of Crime master Gogo. In one of the scenes he calls to ask for ransom money (yes the movie has a kidnapping) and the call gets cut because he was low on balance... :)

Both Ranbir Kapoor and Katrina Kaif look cute and act funny. The supporting cast all fit well in their roles. Smita Jaykar (the Ma) did a cute-trying-to seduce-her-hubby scene which made the public split into a roar of laughter. There are many funny moments in the movie (more in the second half). I will not write about those here and let you all enjoy the Ajab Kahani yourself.

I like the song "Tu jaane na" most and it is picturized well too (in blue tint). Other songs are also good to listen to, like "Tera hone laga hoon" and "Prem ki nayya".

Overall I really enjoyed this movie. A simple funny cute movie.

Apart

2009-11-04T17:09:00.003+05:30

I didn't realize it when she said goodbye and we drifted apart.
In a flash of a second, she was gone.
...Gone light-years away from me.
Today I see her smile from this distance,
but I wonder,
when did those lips curl into that smile...
How many years have passed since then...
And how does she look today...
Magical she was,
and still remains for me.

-A man in love

Dreaming funny

2009-11-02T17:05:00.004+05:30

Last night my lovely sleep was interspersed with a funny activity in my brain and resulted in these dreams...

I am dead and my spirit is asking my father to stop crying. I am trying to console him and tell him that I am not happy to be dead as I have to leave for an unknown destination...that I will really get bored as I won't have anything to do there. Then I ask him whether I can carry my laptop with me. At least that way I will have stuff to read, movies to watch and music to listen too...

(I think I am getting obsessed with my laptop)

Another one.....

I am nervous before my thesis seminar which should start within a few hours. I visit my guide's office and notice that she is having lunch. She looks at me and asks me to get a few 'papads' for her. I roast 2 'papads' and get them for her. Then I ask her to come for my seminar.

(The scene changes)

I am standing in a hall, ready to give my presentation. I begin with 'acknowledgment-slide' and this slide goes on forever. Finally the audience clap and it gets over (too easy). The point to be noticed is that the thesis seminar was taking place in a church and the audience looked as if they have come to attend a wedding.

(Does that mean I am happily married to my work/thesis? I think I am watching too many hollywood movies and at the same time I am little stressed with the preparation for my thesis defense.)

Ek lau is tarah kyun bujhi?

2009-10-31T17:55:00.009+05:30

Picture courtesy: http://www.razorcd.com/wp-content/gallery/photography/extinguished_candle_by_razorcd.jpg

Dhoop ke ujaale si, os ke pyaale si,
khushiyan mile humko.
Zyada maanga hai kahan, sarhadein na ho jahaan,
duniya mile humko.
Par Khuda khair kar,
uske armaan mein, kyun bewajah ho koi qurbaan?
Ghuncha muskurata ek,
waqt se pehle, kyun chhod chala tera ye jahaan?

Ek lau is tarah kyun bujhi mere maula?
Ek lau zindagi ki maula...

Saw the movie Aamir today. A 95 min movie without any song and dance routine (or a romantic angle) which moved me to tears. The movie is thought provoking and leaves many questions unanswered. An innocent man who is circumstantially driven to commit a crime. In the end he has to choose between killing innocent people and becoming a martyr himself.

The movie took me a year back and made me remember few of those martyrs. And I ask the same question as the song above.

Assistant Sub-inspector Tukaram Omble

Major Sandeep Unnikrishnan

Hurdle race...

2009-10-21T15:26:00.002+05:30

Life is turning into a hurdle race.
And at higher difficulty-levels, the hurdles remain invisible....
...making me lick dust after every few steps.

"Life time achievement" award goes to...

2009-10-19T20:04:00.009+05:30

...Sohail and Salman Khan for delivering 'quality products' like this one consistently. Main aur Mrs Khanna was so good that you would not have been able to distinguish the expression on my face for those two hours from that of a random dead body.

The obvious questions which must have arisen in you head would be:

1) What the hell was I doing inside a theatre with the well positioned warning sign which read "Sohail Khan Productions-ENTER AT YOUR OWN RISK")

2) Am I tired of life and was this an unsuccessful suicide attempt?

The answer is that I went to watch this one out of desperation. In the last 2 and a half months in this city the only movies which I have seen are Love Aaj Kal and Kaminey. I missed Wake Up Sid as I failed to get tickets last Sunday and unfortunately it is not running as it had to make way for the 3 great releases this week Blue, All The Best and Main aur Mrs Khanna. I had already received a very 'positive' review of Blue from my buddy so I dropped that out of my list. So, the choice was tough (just like deciding which way to choose for killing self) and I came up with a very logical way to decide. I counted the number of actors in both the movies and the one with lesser number of torture-inflicting-people won. I though it was a smart choice, but it turned out to be the other way.

I almost died of embarrassment when I bumped into somebody I know just outside the theatre. We looked at each other and smiled and in an unspoken manner promised each other that we would keep secret, our whereabouts on 18th October 2009 Sunday afternoon, from the world.

Attention: Mr Aamir Khan

2009-10-10T15:15:00.003+05:30

How could this go unnoticed?

The title of your movie "Dil Hai Ke Maanta Nahin" in Urdu, reads "Dil Hai Ke Maanta HI Nahin".

But Aamir shayad, "...ye jaanta hi nahin"

Ok, I confess I was watching this movie the millionth time last week and I noticed this mish-take.

Once upon a time...

2009-10-09T17:43:00.003+05:30

An accidental peep into the past.

Stumbled upon some pictures and videos which remained hidden in a magic folder.

The female-dominated corner of that floor of that building.

Women, all of them with their own idiosyncrasies.

Memories of bonding, arguments and some fights.

The 'lone' male amongst us. Sometimes pampered, sometimes kicked the most.

Parties. Cake-cutting and smearing.

The pranks. The tough to untie 'PFK' bond (shown in the picture above).

The noise (some more high-pitched than the others) and the running around.

That new-year party which was followed by an animated conversation.

Conversation about 'injecting mosquito-gut into humans to make them immune to malaria'.

Conversation about who is more scared of the lab-senior lady.

Secretly shot videos which got lost in the 320GB disk space, clicked open those old times.

The lab that was... in year 2005.

The Fourth Wall

2009-10-08T20:37:00.004+05:30

One of those nights, when I had nothing to do I was lying in bed while random thoughts were carelessly strolling in my head. The train of thought got stuck when I could not remember the decor on one of the walls of Monica Geller's living room(this explains that sometimes we don't have control on our thoughts).

You enter the apartment, turn right and you are standing in the open-kitchen equipped with shelves full of grocery and appliances. The dining table is placed at a comfortable distance from the cooking space. Adjacent to the dining area, there is a sofa-set and a TV. A poster (with something in French printed on it) occupies the wall over the TV. On the left side of the TV is Monica's bedroom and the on the right is the guest-bedroom (once occupied by Phoebe and Rachel). A major portion of one of the walls is the glass window (that window reminds me of many interesting moments) which opened into the balcony. How did the wall just opposite to this window look like? I don't remember seeing it. Most of the scenes were shot from that direction and hence that wall remained hidden to the viewers.

I am attempting to equate this with something more 'real'.

When it comes to understanding a complex situation in which more than one person is involved, most of us take some stand based on how much we know about it. It is possible that you are completely overlooking the 'fourth-wall' which stands behind your back. It successfully eludes you.

It's movie time...

2009-09-29T20:53:00.002+05:30

Wake Up Sid releases this week. Have been waiting to watch this one for a long time. Been such a long time since I saw a movie, Kaminey being the last one. Will try to catch this one in the coming weekend. Lets see...

Jo barse sapne boond boond
naino ko moond moond,
Kaise main chalun, dekh na sakun
anjaane raaste....
Goonja sa hai koi iktaara, dheeme bole koi iktaara...

I love this song from Wake Up Sid and I love Konkona Sen Sharma. I hope this movie doesn't end up disappointing me.

Durga Puja in Kolkata

2009-09-29T20:25:00.010+05:30

Brightening up the night

The pandal at Mohd Ali park (very pretty)

The pratima at Mohd Ali Park

How come we are alive after all that pushing and pulling?

Waiting to get in...

The pratima at the College Square pandal

We came out alive, once again...

A pretty panel outside one of the pandals

At Karunamoyi, Salt Lake. The theme was "Save Girl Child"

I liked this one the most.

Sleepless in 'Temple-city'

2009-09-13T19:46:00.003+05:30

In the 30 years of my life this was the first time that I had to stay without electricity for more than 3 days. And I thought UP-Bihar was bad... This place is worse. I hate the laid back attitude of people here.

For 3 nights all of us poor residents of a hostel (which belongs to a government institute) had sleep with sweat dripping and swarm of mosquitoes to entertain us whole night.

the candle after it had lived its life

Social contagion

2009-09-13T17:36:00.008+05:30

Read this article in today's New York Times: Is happiness catching?

James H Fowler and Nicholas A Christakis have published quite a few papers on social networking and how it affects the behaviour of people. A couple of papers describe the patterns in gain of weight and smoking habits of residents of a town Framingham during the period of 30 years. Their findings suggest that these changes do not occur randomly but in clusters or groups of people who are socially connected. I was not surprised to learn that smoking habits spread in this manner. But I had not thought the same way regarding some other parameters that they studied including "happiness". They report that unhappiness or happiness extends upto three degrees of separation, e.g. friends of one's friends' friends and this part of their work has been questioned by many in the same field. I would like to read some of their papers which have been published in high impact journals like NEJM and BMJ.

I find such research work which deals with social behaviour and psychology very exciting. Will see if I can get involved in any similar project sometime in future. But my current research work doesn't provide me with any expertise which will be required for this slightly distant field. :(

My gut flora is biased

2009-09-11T15:11:00.003+05:30

Why is it that all the 'negative' gut feelings of mine are proved correct with time? But never does this happen with the 'positive' gut feelings.

(Inspiration for writing such micro-posts comes from Falstaff. )

Lovely weekend!

2009-09-07T19:13:00.009+05:30

Had a very relaxing weekend this time. It was the first time in the whole month when I didn't have an experiment to do on saturday-sunday. The new work in the new lab keeps me busy from Saturday to Tuesday and rest of the days are mostly free. Because of some problem the experiments could not be conducted this weekend. And the weather has been specially great for the past one week or so. I took advantaged of it and slept (or lazyily lied in bed watching it rain from the window) a lot on both saturday and sunday. Amongst some of the good things in this city, is the absence of sky-scrapers which leaves a lot of sky to be gazed at. And i love it. Will post some pictures of the evening sky from the institute terrace sometime soon.

Sunday was spent in reading the newspaper (the epaper) leisurely. Then I went to the nearby Cafe Coffee Day (it keeps me alive) and had a Cafe Frappe with vanilla ice- cream (Yum!!!). Then I came back to the institute, went through the updates of blogs I follow. Then, courtesy 'youtube' saw some songs and I realize that very often I feel like watching the same songs over and over again. At least I am addicted to these 3.

1) Khuda jaane: I love the lyrics of this song and the way it has been picturized. My favourite line (which many of my friends will guess) is "Tu kahe to khwab ka bana ke main bahaana sa, mila karoon sirhaane pe". And I like the picturization of the line just preceding this line "Tu kahe to tere hi qadam ke main nishan pe, chalun rukun ishaare pe". The scene shows Deepika Padukone walking over sand which shows a pair of footprints and then the camera flips 180 degrees and Ranbeer Kapoor is seen walking at a distance, with his back towards the lady. I find this scene really romantic. :)

2) Bol na halke halke: This is another amazing song with great lyrics from one horrible movie. The picturization is not very good but i still like watching this song because of the bright colored dresses (except Abhishek Bachchan's red kurta which makes Priti Zinta believe that he is a coolie). It is very difficult to select my favourite line from this song as I like the complete song and the way Rahat Fatef Ali Khan has sung it. Still I would mention this one "Kitne dino se ye aasmaan bhi soya nahi hai, is ko sula dein...".

3) Chup chup ke: Bunty aur Babli is one 'fun-movie' which I like watching again and again. And this song is one romantic song which I like listening and watching because of the chemistry shown by the lead couple who look great together and enhance the better features of each other. I like their "Kabhi neem neem, kabhi shahad shahad" for the same reason.

There are some more songs which I watch very often for reasons which may be biased because I love those two guys (AK and FA). :)

Saturday was the birthday of a very dear friend of mine currently on the other side of the world. A lot of time was spent in going through old photos and I found this appropriate one. Happy Birthday!

The "Chocolate-Almond" cake

Today is another friend's birthday. Happy birthday to you!

The usual cake-cutting venue.

Life has to move on...

2009-09-02T19:09:00.019+05:30

The peephole and the purple door

As the final episode of FRIENDS ended, my mind flew to my old friends and my old home/room 311. I thought that I can watch all the ~200 episodes again and relive the life of Ross, Rachel, Monica, Chandler, Phoebe and Joey. But I will never find those 6 years of my life again. They will remain just in my memories, which I revisit often. I hate moving on...

The usual scene of my room (that was). The chair in view was a silent spectator of million hugs, laughters and some tears. Snacking. Reading news-paper. Random net-surfing. Not to forget the tv-viewing.

After the room was cleaned the last time and fresh bed-sheets were laid

Last bunch of flowers I got to 311

The table full of random things and the book-shelf

The table and the shelf, as they looked when I left them (with the lone rose)

The wall with several art-pieces and the bed-side shelf

The same

A few of my old possessions in the current new surrounding

Same old flowers in my new home

Dhan ta nan

2009-08-14T19:00:00.003+05:30

I liked Kaminey. (I am talking about the movie and not general kaminey in the world).

Content wise the movie bears resemblance with many other movies dealing with the Mumbai's underworld. But Vishal Bhardwaj's Kaminey is still worth a watch. The credit goes to Shahid Kapoor who looks great and acts even better. Priyanka Chopra has relatively less to do in the movie. Often she is called to share the screen space when there is a need for some kind of "hyper-ness".

The background score and the songs go perfectly in sync and adds to the pace of the movie. Amongst the songs I like Dhan ta nan, Raat ke dhai baje and the title song. There were some scenes in the movie which I felt like capturing in the form of still photograph. Will do an image search and see if I can get some of them.

A note for the Oriya audience: I am sorry but I hate you. I can't sit and watch a movie with paan-spitting men who get excited during intimate scenes and leave their seats to practise their mawaali steps at the sound of Dhan ta nan. The public took half the joy away from this movie. For the first 15 minutes I could not hear the dialogues because the public decided to lip-sync instead.

For Mumbai: I love you. I was happy to hear some marathi dialogues, moreso because the oriya public failed to understand anything and started screaming 'subtitles-subtitles'. And when the cast of the movie ate vada-pav (at more than one instance), I felt like going to BEST bus top and having one myself. :(

Way back into love...

2009-08-13T19:34:00.006+05:30

I have been living with a shadow overhead,
I have been sleeping with a cloud above my bed,
I have been lonely for so long...
I have been hiding my hopes and dreams away,
Just in case I ever need them again someday,
I have been setting aside time,
To clear a little space in the corners of my mind.
I have been watching but the stars refuse to shine,
I have been searching but I just don't see the signs.
I know that it's out there,
There's gotta be something for my soul somewhere.
All I wanna do is find a way back into love,
I can't make it through without a way back into love,
And if I open my heart to you,
I'm hoping you will show me what to do,
And if you help me to start again,
You know that I'll be there for you in the end.

Saw 'Music and Lyrics' and liked it a lot. After a long time I got to watch a simple romantic movie sans any kind of drama. The songs in the movie were great, specially this one...quite meaningful.

Another movie I recently saw was '50 First Dates'. Another really sweet movie, but it made me cry. :(

And all this movie-watching is happening on my new laptop. :)

I am happy.

Of my (almost) lost culinary skills

2009-08-12T17:58:00.006+05:30

The other day I was watching the FRIENDS episode in which Monica made candies for her neighbours as a sweet gesture and a first step towards knowing them (7th season). In one of the scenes, Chandler asks her whether the reason for her becoming a chef was to make people like her. And she didn't answer that.

I used to cook a lot a few years back. Slowly that practise declined because I got more busy with the research and thesis. I still did cook sometimes whenever it became a matter of life and death. e.g. Those days (of the famous 'sleeping sickness') when I slept for 15-16 hours and woke up finally at 2 am. A bowl of khichdi, vegetable rice or tehri, suji ka halwa used to be the frequently cooked items, with the last one strictly for pampering myself. But this 'need-based-cooking' failed to give the usual satisfaction or joy which I used to feel earlier.

And I realize that it does make a difference when you cook for somebody else apart from yourself. Appreciation is just a part of it. I can't explain the actual feeling...but it is something which cannot be compared to anything else. I remember almost all the comments people have made after having alu paratha, chhole, alu-matar, fruit custard, sewiyan, kheer...cooked by me. Not all of them were flattering but i still remember them.

Senthil one of those 'rare' negative comments were made by you. Remember? And Pavi, you remember the day we had plain dal and rice on a sunday evening? Angie I remember your face after you had that khichdi. :)

I miss those days.

The place where I am staying these days doesn't have cooking facility. I wish I got a chance to sharpen those skills once again and revive the long-lost feeling of joy. I wish...

On a happier note, since last few months I have been lucky enough to feel a different kind of joy... the one you get when somebody else cooks for you. Besan ka halwa, homemade chocolate, soya-roll, pasta.... Missing you buddy. I want that chocolate with more peanuts. :)

The moral of this post: I need somebody to either cook for me or let me cook for him/her. :)

Picture courtesy: http://www.nataliedee.com/010203/cooking.jpg

Of lizards, cockroaches, ants and many more...

2009-07-31T21:09:00.003+05:30

I step into the bathroom. Skip a few steps. And then it is time to turn on the shower.

Swooooooshhhh..... Water pours down forcefully. Things are fine for a few moments. I keep an eye on the two lizards which seem to be conspiring in a corner. Any movement on their part might require shifting of my clothes hanging on the small hook on the same wall.

Suddenly two cockroaches appear from somewhere and they decide to fly in randomness. And one of them manages to settle on my body (don't ask me where), which is followed by a lot of jumping and shrieking. Things are back to normal.

Day 2. There is only one lizard today. The spiders seem to be happily sleeping. Some harmless ants are crawling in the corner. Who cares about them. No cockroaches in view. I smile. After a while I feel something crawling on my foot. It was a centipede-like-thing. More shrieking and jumping. Things back to normal (almost). I turn off the shower and grab my towel. This time there was something crawling down my back. Was it a gravity-defying-silly- drop-of water? Or was it something else. No shrieking or jumping happened this time. I slid my hand over the back and didnt find anything "wild" there.

Today is another day. I am brave. I will survive. :)

Love Aaj Kal

2009-07-31T20:15:00.003+05:30

Managed to catch the 'premier' show of Love Aaj Kal in the new city which is my temporary work-place for a few days. The crowd mainly comprised of college-going-youngsters which contributed to a hell lot of enthusiasm and noise in the theatre.

The first half of the movie when the story was developing, seemed to be promising but the second half is so bad that I don't even have appropriate words to descibe my disappointment. Saif has lost his famous 'comic-touch'. And he doesn't look great. And it is apparent that he did this movie half-heartedly. Or may be it is because he was more into the job of 'producing' this movie. Deepika Padukone looked fine and acted ok too... May be i didnt expect much from her anyway. The character she played in 'Love Aaj Kal' seemed like a off-shoot of her character in 'Bachna Ae Haseeno'. Amongst the few things which I liked in the movie were the songs- "Ye dooriyan...", "We Twist" and "Chor Bazaari". Knowing the fact that Pritam is the music director of this movie, some of these songs might be 'inspired' from Korean TV serials. Right now I am not aware of that and i like the songs :).

'Love Aaj Kal' is a tale of two confused people in love. It takes a marriage and a divorce to make them understand that they actually love each other. I found it quite foolish actually and that irritated me.

One last point... Somebody should advise Rahul Khanna to stay away from movies.

Did it all...while I was there.

2009-07-30T18:41:00.005+05:30

Rocks. Gazing at the sea and feeling the breeze on my face.

Colaba. Shopping. Plain-salted corn. BEST bus. Window seat. Music playing in my ears. Walking in rain from the bus-stop to the institute.

Colonnade. Me and "my mice". Wind trying to blow us off.

A movie. Alone but not lonely. 9pm-12am.

Friends. Smiles. Hugs.

Long-intellectual-talks-before-going-to-bed with Buddy.

Last but most important. Thesis. Submitted.

Rain Rain...please stay...

2009-07-09T10:39:00.005+05:30

...I will be there soon.

I have just been reading about the rains this year. Since the day I have landed in Bangalore, the rain-gods have moved away.

So, in search of rain I am moving to the city I love, hoping to feel some rain drops on my face and listen to that sound made by wet-rubber slippers. And I want to use my new umbrella too... And I want to look at the billowing sea... And I want to be blown away by the wind while walking through the colonnade... And...the list is endless.

These are the only drops of rain I have seen in this season

P.S. And finally it rained here today :)

Wimbledon and old memories...

2009-07-06T02:02:00.009+05:30

Roger Federer won the Wimbledon final against Andy Roddick, this being his 15th Grand-slam title and a record in the history of tennis. It was after years that I sat through a tennis match and realized how much I used to enjoy watching it once upon a time...around 20 years back.

I was introduced to tennis by a friend of mine who was a die hard fan of Steffi Graf. Actually I have never come across a single tennis fan who doesn't like Steffi Graf. I am not an expert to comment on her gaming techniques, but I used to love watching her play and win. I remember her losing only to Martina Navratilova.

Amongst all the other tennis grand-slams Wimbledon holds a special place. I remember following Wimbledon matches every year during the first week of July, which used to be the time of beginning of new session in school. There was one women's singles final between Steffi Graf and Jana Novotna which i still remember and I can recall how much the latter cried during the prize distribution ceremony. I remembered that today when I saw Andy Roddick losing to Roger Federer. Felt sorry for him :(. It was one of his best performance till date.

I remember Stefen Edberg and Michael Stich winning Wimbledon men's singles finals in 1990 and 1991. I remember their photographs holding or kissing the trophy in the next day's newspaper and on the cover of 'Sports Illustrated'.

I remembered how watching these guys win meant a lot to me back then. I have nearly stopped following any sport for more than 10 years now. The last cricket match I saw was the one with Kumble's 1o wicket haul. But more than cricket, I love watching tennis. I am trying to rediscover my love for the game.

And, last but not the least, Roger is cute :)

Nothing is simple

2009-07-02T13:27:00.002+05:30

There are at least 2 reasons/explanations for every action of ours or others, good or bad. One of them is visible superficially and can be the truth sometimes but not always...
To keep life simple, it is better to accept this one.

Allergic to this city

2009-07-02T12:39:00.002+05:30

After 2 weeks and 20 cetrizine (and similar) tablets I have come to this conclusion that this city doesn't like me and I don't like it either. I thank my stars that despite all my prayers (6 years back) I did not get selected in either of the 2 institutes in this city. Bombay....I love you!

Achhhhoooooo.......!
I hate it.

So much to write...let me start from somewhere...

2009-06-30T01:48:00.003+05:30

I am still not tired of lazying around. In the last 14 days which I have spent at home I have just been eating, sleeping, watching TV, random (and some not so random) internet surfing. It is true that I have been on this kind of vacation after 6 long years. And I am enjoying it. But that does not mean that am not missing the life I had been leading before coming here. I am missing every bit of it, both the pains and the gains. I miss Bombay. I miss my friends. I feel like a nomad these days, traveling with a part of my life packed in a suitcase and the rest scattered hither thither. The place I called my own for 6 years belongs to somebody else now... All that deserves a separate post. Also, a lot of introspection has been happening since the day I have been lying idle. Will see if i can share a part of it here. But today there is something completely different which prompted me to return to my blog.

I remembered a scene from Aamir Khan starrer Ghulam. Ghulam does not come under the category of good meaningful cinema but still there are some scenes in this movie which stand out. AK plays the role of Siddharth, younger brother of a guy who works for a underworld don (or you may call him a local goon). Siddharth is a 'gunda in making' with his heart still at the right place (something like 'Munnabhai'). He loves boxing (undergoes some training too). There is this boxing match in the movie in which Siddharth fights another boxing champion. This match was something he had been waiting for both, to fulfill his passion as well as to showcase his skills in front of his elder brother. After giving the opponent a tough fight, when Siddharth was just about to win his brother comes to the boxing ring (during one of the breaks in between the match) and whispers in his ears "Haar Ja". The reason being loads of money being on stake because of the betting going on in the match. The way his brother casually orders him to lose the match he had been preparing for since ages shocks him. The feeling that, for his brother the amount of money made during the match was more important than his winning it, sunk in. He loses the match but before that he deliberately gets beaten up badly by his half-dead staggering opponent, refusing to get knocked-out....hurting himself in order to hurt his brother who stands like a silent observer at first and then urges the match referee to stop the match.

I would have done the same....

Just a call away...

2009-06-09T11:59:00.004+05:30

Since the past few years many of my close friends are located in different far-away lands. Every time one of them left from here (i.e. India) I used to get this feeling that things will not remain the same between us. And its true that life is not the same without them being physically present around me. But having them just a call away provides the comfort which keeps me going.

In the past few stressful months all of my far-away friends have shared my mood-swings and irritations as much as those around me. Whether it was general cribbing or a teary conversation, a wake-up call or a gossip to share...all on international calling rates. Just yesterday I spoke to a friend after a long time and I completely forgot that he was on the other side of the world and we discussed all the possible stupid jokes that we used to share and laughed uncontrollably. He giggled as he used to after cracking those silly jokes. Felt so much like old times... Later when I was lying in bed trying to sleep, I felt like calling him and saying "Good night". I did call and left a message in his voice mailbox. Minutes later, he called and said "Good night, now sleep."

Friends stay forever.

On this day, last year...

2009-06-07T01:59:00.006+05:30

...I was on my way to Frankfurt. Actually I was going to Austria to attend a conference related to my work. I chose to fly to Germany and travel by train to Austria for quite a few reasons. Firstly, most of my friends whom I was meeting stayed across Germany. Second reason is more obvious...I love travelling by train.

Also, Train travel + Europe = DDLJ
Ok I didn't succeed in meeting my Raj, but there were plenty of other 'interesting' experiences.
One of them I have already shared here. I will write about the rest some other time when I feel like. This post is about something else.

As I was waiting to board the flight at Bombay Airport, thoughts of several kinds kept me busy.
I was excited as this was the first time I was travelling out of India and I was scared for the same reason too. I was happy that I was going to meet a few friends after a long time. And I was nervous for my presentation at the conference. And I was prepared to feel all this and deal with all these feelings as I had been thinking about all these things for more than 10 days before the travel. But there was something which I was not prepared for...

The flight was supposed to leave Bombay at 17:30 hrs but it got a bit late. At 18:35 hrs, finally the plane was ready to take off and it slowly started moving towards the runway. I couldn't get a window or aisle seat. So, i was ended up sitting between two fat middle-aged men. My mood was slightly off because of this and also because the flight didn't look like the international flight that I had imagined. It looked like I was sitting in an Air Deccan plane with many Indians and a few foreigners. I took out the book I was reading and began turning pages. Then I thought that I will start reading only after the plane takes off and I glanced out of the 'half-window' which my neighbour left unblocked.

The pilot made the final announcement that the plane is going to take off from Bombay and will be landing at Bahrain Airport after ~3 hrs. I don't know what happened to me at that moment, and tears welled up my eyes. I felt something which I had never felt nor anticipated to feel. The feeling that I was going somewhere very very far away from the place/country which i consider mine had suddenly sunk in. After that incident I don't know whether I will be able to stay away from my country if need be.

Overall that trip was really great and I got to meet new people and see new places. Two people I met on my Bombay-Bahrain-Frankfurt journey were Sussane and Gerd. They were German engineers and had come to India for some work. They shared their experiences in India. It was really good chatting with them. We sat at a small cafe at the Bahrain Airport and talked and talked for almost 4 hours. After meeting them and talking to them I felt much better and realized that basically all of us are very alike. Initially when I got down the plane and walked towards the lounge at Bahrain airport I saw so many people from different countries, wearing different kinds of clothes, having so very different facial features, that initially I felt lost and lonely. But after meeting these two people I felt much better. It was the perfect beginning of a perfect 2 week long trip.

Costa coffee at Bahrain Airport, where Sussane, Gerd and I sat and chatted for most of the time.

What do you do when...

2009-06-05T18:27:00.002+05:30

...you lie down to take a short nap after staying up whole night and then you wake up 4 hours later and discover an sms from the BOSS asking you to meet her at a particular time which is nowhere near 'future' or 'present'...

With shaking fingers and trembling heart I called up the BOSS to apologize.
One of the rare moments (yes it has become a rarity at this juncture) or may be I was lucky, I did not get screamed at.

That has made my day!

The current state of events are such that I don't need an 'active-good-event' to cheer me up. Absence of 'bad' ones is sufficient. :)

And I have still not watched a movie (been more than 2 months). This is the longest I have stayed away from theatres. The blood-movie-level is sub-zero. I want to survive this difficult phase. (There is a chance of watching a movie tonight...lets see if it materializes)

I want my thesis to finish itself (i don't mean commit suicide).
And then I will be free....
Let me dream for a while............

DELETE

2009-05-26T22:13:00.002+05:30

From 'E' Drive to 'Recycle Bin': Not very difficult

Empty 'Recycle Bin': Tough job.

Control-Alt-Delete: Will do it one day.

I like 'Blue'

2009-05-21T19:55:00.006+05:30

After working on my thesis (and doing some time-pass) whole night, I happened to peep out of the window and look at the striking shade of blue in the sky. I immediately looked around for my camera. It took some 90 seconds before I could click this photo and in that span of time the coloour of the sky changed a bit. Nevertheless, it is still very near to (but not exactly) the 'blue' which I like.

I am neither very fond of a particular colour (except mauve and lilac) or hate a particular colour. I remember that as a child I didn't like 'yellow' at all. As I grew up, in my mind I started associating colours with different things. E.g. I like 'yellow' when it is a flower which I am looking at (and not Tata Nano or any other car). I would never wear a bright-yellow dress, but that doesn't mean I don't like the colour.

Similarly, I love certain shades of 'blue' which look best in a sky or in a water body. Looking at any of my favourite colours (or shades) in the object of my choice somehow makes me feel elated. (silly things excite me)

Thinking about 'blue' reminded me of the scene in 'Kabhi Alvida Na Kehna' when Rani Mukherjee calls out to Shahrukh Khan saying, "I like blue" which in that situation was supposed to mean "I love you". I liked that scene and the song which followed (Tumhi dekho na...). Actually there are many more things about KANK which I liked. I really regret removing that post from my blog in which I had written why I liked KANK. That post was one of the most 'popular' posts of my blog and million people who googled for "extra-marital affairs" landed on my blog through that post. And that post also had some very interesting comments from anonymous people (anonymous comments on my blog were allowed then). A guy (i think it was a guy) after knowing my views on KANK had commented "Are you interested in having an extra-marital affair?" :)

Oh no!!! This post was not supposed to be this long.... I will go back to work now.

P.S. Last two images are scenes from KANK (the song "Tumhi dekho na"...). Oh I love the songs from this movie, specially "Mitwa...".

And my sincere apology to all married guys, even though I like certain things about KANK, I am not interested in having an extra-marital affair. :)

O Yuva Yuva....

2009-05-17T20:12:00.004+05:30

Ban Ja Re Ban Ja, Mashaal-e-Raah,

O Yuva Yuva...O Yuva...

Too many things to write...no time :(

Ganga

2009-05-16T21:12:00.001+05:30

River Ganga

(Kanpur; April 2009)

Reciprocation

2009-05-14T06:55:00.003+05:30

Is reciprocation of love important/necessary?

If it is, then why does it happen so often that we end up loving and caring for someone who pays no heed to it?

Or on the other hand how do we happily grab love and attention being showered from those who care for us more than we care about them?

Is this not some kind of an "imbalance of love"?

May be I am just too sleepy and brain-dead to have been thinking about these questions...

Last night...

2009-05-03T19:46:00.004+05:30

http://www.usefilm.com/images/2/8/5/9/2859/732054-medium.jpg

Last night when I stood there, millions of unrelated thoughts kept coming and vanishing from my head. I was not able to hold on any one of them. I tried for a while and then lost to myself. They stood near me and kept talking to each other. I tried to listen to them but everything seemed incomprehensible.

With my back towards one of the 26/11 targets I rested both my hands on the cemented railing and gazed at the sea. Before I could realize I was already playing with the shimmering reflection of light in the sea. Focussing...defocussing...focussing again. And the streaks of light grew bigger and smaller like a wriggling snake in water. In the background the small boats bobbed up and down with beautiful irregularities, each one of them following its own rhythm. I smiled... Its not always that I notice such things.

Aaj kal mein dhal gaya, din hua tamaam.
Tu bhi so ja, so gayi rang bhari shaam.

Amaltas

2009-05-01T20:06:00.003+05:30

I am almost there...the place from where this journey began. It looks a little different though. I don't remember how much time has passed. But I do remember that I was not alone then.

I had decided to go on this expedition in search of something special. It is not that I failed, but whatever I gained, I had to leave it behind. My hands are empty but the heart carries the load of both the loss and the gain.

Very soon I might forget it all or may be not. But one thing is sure, being the traveller that I am, I will surely begin another quest which will then lead me on a completely different journey. Till then I will just rest for a while.

Today what reminds me of that journey are the yellow amaltas flowers in bloom. It was this time of the year...

http://www.flowersofindia.net/catalog/slides/Amaltas.jpg

I have lost the ability to write

2009-04-29T03:40:00.002+05:30

It has been such a long time since i wrote something here. The main reason is that all the "writing" has been channelised towards one direction. And in spite of devoting all the time (ok most of my time) very little progress is happening. And it is really demoralising. :(

I am a bad writer.

Or, to make myself feel a little better, i can say that i am really bad when it comes to "scientific writing".

Almost the whole of last week was spent in writing and re-writing the synopsis of my work. My guide is right when she says that she has no idea how and when will i finish writing my thesis. But I will do it. And I will do it soon. Till then, sagittalsection will remain inactive. Just wanted to tell all of you who check my blog frequently. I will be back, very soon, at the same place. (I am not shifting my blog to some secret location, though it's a great idea.)

Why did the Indian Producers Association start this war with the multiplexes? I have not seen a movie for the past one month. I really need it. And yes, my hero played a big role in this whole episode. So i have to accept it. And may be it was all done so that I can concentrate on my thesis first and then the friday-releases. The only way it seems to be helping me is by having a positive effect on my already-diminished-bank-balance.

These days there is an infectious padhai-ka-mahaul around me. The 1st & 2nd year students are busy with their courses and exams. The final years are writing their thesis. It makes me feel so much better when i see others studying too. It inspires me. I remember when we were kids, i used to feel awful when i had exams in my school while my brother would be lazying after finishing his.

Before every sitting to read/write/contemplate, I go through a small checklist:

a) Is my room or work-area clean and organized?
b) Do i have all the old notes, books, papers etc (even the most useless ones) within my reach?
c) Is there sufficient water in my bottle to last 3-4 hours? Also, there should be something to munch in between.
d) Do i have my favourite music on my comp?
e) The TV remote should be nearby too, just in case i feel like taking a small break.
f) Bholu and my favourite pillow should also be with me for my comfort.

That's it. Once all this paraphernalia is around me, i start reading/writing efficiently. The only good thing about me is that i can sit and work for really long time. I am not restless and don't need to move around every now and then.

What else should i write now? Haan...let me end this post full of randomness with the song which is playing in my head right now.

Ye tumhari meri baaten, humesha yun hi chalti rahen.
Ye humaari mulaaqaaten, humesha yun hi chalti rahen.
Beete yun hi apne saare din-raat
Baaton se nikalti rahe, nayi baat...

I am singing it to my 'imaginary lover'. Poor guy can't even run away and save his soul. :)
I think I am getting a little inspired by Phoebe after watching all those FRIENDS episodes recently. Yes CAT, you won't believe me, I am watching FRIENDS these days.

A journey

2009-04-17T02:16:00.004+05:30

New Delhi Railway Station, Aug 2003

Mumbai Central Railway Station, Dec 2003

Chattrapati Shivaji Airport, Mumbai, Sep 2005

Heidelberg Hbf, June 2008

Frankfurt Airport, June 2008

Lucknow, April 2009

...never mind!

I am feeling 'Lucky By Chance'....

2009-03-26T02:43:00.006+05:30

Got to see Farhan Akhtar. This time a little closely :)

The heart-throb...

...signing my diary

Right now I am a little busy with some work, so the next post will carry the details of the "Vagina Monologues" which I saw this evening.

Picture courtesy: B. M. M.

Drama on Lauh-pad-gamini

2009-03-24T03:01:00.010+05:30

For those who don't know what is 'Lauh-pad-gamini', it means 'train' (I learnt that from Chupke Chupke). And let me re-emphasize the fact that I love train journeys. One of them is over and the other is round the corner. The reason for the upcoming journey deserves another post and I will write about it later.

If life is a journey, I would like it to be a train journey. That's what the new look of my blog says too. The other day I was talking to a friend and this question came up "How do you think life has changed you?" There are so many things but the first thing which came in my head was: I have learnt to extract joy from 'little' things in life and even the otherwise 'major' things can't keep my spirits down for long. Yes, things do affect me but I have learnt to move on.

But this post is not about lessons of life. It is about 'trains' and 'movies', which occupy a special position in my life. :)

There are so many instances where a train journey is a sub-plot of a hindi movie. The hero and the heroine meet on the train (Jab We Met). The hero dances on top of the train (Dil se). The fallen labour-union leader keeps travelling aimlessly in trains, all through his life in order to run away from his past (Deewar). The hero runs a dus-dus ki daud on railway tracks and proves that he is not scared of the approaching train (Ghulam, have to mention at least one of his movies) :)

Following are some of my favourite scenes shot on or around a train:

1) Swades: This scene was the turning point of the movie. "Paani le lo paani, pachees paise ka ek glass". The vendor, a small kid, urges Mohan Bhargav to buy a glass (or should I say a kullhad/earthen cup) of water at the station of some remote village in India. Deeply moved by the recent events, Mohan Bhargav finally tastes the water of 'India'. And with that sip of water he seems to make some resolutions which become clear as the movie unfolds. No matter how many times I see this scene, it affects me as much as it did the first time. It is one of those moments when I liked Shahrukh Khan or may be it was Mohan Bhargav.

2) Jab we met: The scene when Geet meets Aditya in train. She keeps on chattering even when the other party was least interested in the conversation. Like a helpful co-passenger she helps him out by playing a mediator between him and the ticket checker. One of the gems she utters is "Bhai sahab aap convince ho gaye hain ya main aur bolun". Now who would, in reply to that, ask her to continue speaking nonsense. And another funny one was when she asks Aditya, "Drugs-shrugs liya hai kya?". This is one of the few movies in which I was able to tolerate Kareena Kapoor. (She was good in Omkara too)

3) Saathiya: The scene when Aditya proposes to Suhani, standing near the door of a local train and in reply to that Suhani asks him "I love you, means what? Kya kar sakte ho mere liye? Train se kood sakte ho?" And he replies in affirmation, "Haan, train ke rukte hi kood jaoonga". Really smart guy.

4) Yuva: This scene comes towards the end of the movie when an anxious Sashi is sitting in a train waiting for her husband. The train leaves the platform and soon the ticket checker arrives. Performing his duty, the ticket checker asks Sashi about the whereabouts of the other passenger who is supposed to be travelling with her. What follows next is the outburst of a woman who has been suppressing her anger for too long. A woman who has no idea where her husband is at that moment. Whether he is alive or dead. Is in train or somewhere else. And in the final sentence of this 'heated' monologue she compares the half of the humanity carrying the 'Y' chromosome to a certain species. One has to see this scene to feel it. You can see the anguish of a woman. Rani Mukherji has done a good job.

5) Before Sunrise: Jesse and Celine meet on train. Two complete strangers. The conversation begins with a casual chat followed by both of them getting down the train in order to spend a day together. The sequel of the movie 'Before Sunset' sees them meeting for the second time in 10 years. Both of these are one of the best romantic movies I have seen. I would like to know what happens to Jesse and Celine, the next time they meet, if they ever do...

6) Dilwale Dulhania Le Jayenge: How can I forget this one? I still feel like a teenager when I see the two scenes of the movie when Simran runs to catch the train and both the times, Raj is there with his arms spread out. Do I need to say anything else... :)

Come hop in train.... :)

He still remains...

2009-03-16T03:49:00.007+05:30

number 1, for me...

What happened to me last week has already been repeated, word-by-word, to at least 20 people and I got bored of the whole episode and did not feel the enthusiasm to write it on my blog. But then I didn't write anything else here because this has to be written 'first'. :)
So I waited to regain the enthu and for the feeling to sink in, that I met 'him' for the second time in my life (so far). OMG! YES I DID!!!

Exactly 5 years back he visited our institute auditorium to see this concert. I had just joined the institute 6 months before this event. That fateful day the buzz spread around when somebody saw him amongst the audience. Finally, I managed to catch him back stage while he was taking an autograph from Pt. Hari Prasad Chaurasia, who autographed his flute and gave it to him. I was a witness to that event. Now if I have to describe his look, let me just tell you that he was shooting for the 'disastrous' Mangal Pandey. That means I hardly could see his face which was majorly covered by his moustache. And his long and curly tresses covered his face partially and over that (if I remember correctly) he was wearing a cap. When I and the others went to him to take his autograph, he seemed very reluctant and somewhat irritated. My guess is that he didn't like it when the whole crowd went to him and ignored the very senior and acclaimed artist who had performed that evening. He signed our papers/books while keeping a very sombre face and he didn't say a word to any of us. I didn't feel good that day.

He has been the only artist (till very recently i.e. 29th January 2009) I have loved since I started understanding movies. Anybody who knows me a little, is aware of my 'madness'. So much that my friends call me and congratulate me when his movie does well, and pour all the cricism over me when his movie fails and call me to cheer me up when his movie failed to win the Oscar. And in return I irritate all my friends by talking about him and defending him when anything goes wrong. I am like that as far as Aamir Khan is concerned. I just can't help it...its too late now. :)

I didn't like his last release (except that song, you know which one) and that's what I wrote on my blog. Then 29th Jan happened, followed by 14th Feb and another story began. I was wondering whether my 'love' for him is disappearing. The surprise test was conducted on 11th March 2009 and my 'love' passed the test.

That day (which was 'Holi') I was coming back to the institute after watching 2 movies back to back (Luck By Chance-a 2nd time, don't ask me why and the horrible 13B) and I saw a huge line of cars on the way. Then I realized that the Zubin Mehta concert was supposed to be held at our institute auditorium. I just shared my thought with a friend, "What if Aamir Khan comes here again?" and he shut me up and asked me to stop dreaming. 30 seconds later another friend called me and said exactly what I had thought and I started jumping there and then, in the middle of the road.

It was only after an hour that I could catch a glimpse of him from a small distance. And after another one and a half hour I was standing next to him taking his autograph and trying to make him recall that he had come to this same place 5 years ago. Then he looked at me and said "Yeah, Right,right!". Those 5 seconds when he looked in my eyes while I looked into his, will remain with me forever. I was completely numb/lost that moment. Then he returned my diary and I requested him to write the date where he had signed. He did that and then I wished him a happy birthday, to which he did not reply. I took back my diary but stood there looking at him while he continued giving autograph to other people. Then he asked me to pass my diary so that he can use it as a support as most other people had got sheets of paper. I gave it back to him and stood there. This time I had a reason to be standing there.

Finally, it got over and he left, just to come back the next day. Saw him again when he fleeted past us and I skipped a beat again.

After 20 years...he is still there and I still feel the same for him. I love him.

The moment is gone, but every night before sleeping I take out both his autographs and gaze at them and smile. :)

Pichchle saat dino mein...

2009-03-09T02:54:00.009+05:30

...maine sirf aaraam kiya.

And now after a week long rest and staying away from humanity, finally I can sing.

Are you confused? Let me tell you in detail. I joined a crash-course for singing. The course requires intensive training for a period of 7 days. During this duration you have to stay confined in a small room and keep quiet for at least 23 hours a day. Finally on the 8th day, when you open your mouth to speak, the only thing which you would be able to do is 'sing'.

If you believed what I just said, you are even more silly than me. :)

I was down with bronchial asthma this time. Forget singing, I could not even talk properly without feeling breathless. Most of the time in the last week was spent in sleeping or coughing (and puking). What made the matters worse was the dysfunctional geyser in the hostel bathroom. Imagine the agony of bathing in cold water and not being able to sing. (Remember the Sanjeev Kumar song, "Thande thande paani se..."). And now after being on bronchodilaters for a week, finally I can sing while bathing. Little joys of life :)

Last evening I watched 'The Reader'. I really liked the movie, specially the second half. I cannot comment on whether the Oscar for the best-actress was well deserved or not. But overall the movie was impressive. The characters of both the main protagonists were well etched. Michael, a teenager who has a short affair with a much older Hanna, a mysterious woman who seldom disclosed anything about herself. Hanna's sudden disappearance and the effect it has on Michael. He never gets over her and this affects his subsequent relationships. He sees her again in a situation he had never imagined. His conflicting emotions have been best shown. The sequence which moved me the most came towards the end when Michael reaches to Hanna by a series of 'tapes'/'cassettes'.

Hanna, being read to by Michael (The Reader)

Sunday evening was spent in watching the annual Filmfare awards. It was after ages (i think 10-12 years) that i diligently sat in front of the tv to catch some award function. I had lost interest in awards long ago because my favourite doesn't come to these functions. But my other 'lateshht' favourite does :)

I had read in the papers last sunday that he will be performing first in the evening. And I rushed back to hostel from Colaba as soon it was 7:45pm. And I was on time. Enjoyed the whole function in which he took the center stage more than once. He performed on Rock On songs. Then, he got the award for the best debutante. And later he anchored the music-category awards, in which one of the awards went to his 'Pappa'. It was a treat. Fantastic end to the week.

This is the latest addition to my wall

And finally in the night I decided to do some small amount of work about which I had been thinking for quite some time. I tore some 200 pages of my diary and made beautiful triangles, parallelogram,. quadrilaterals, squares, rectangles, pentagrams and many more shapes which our geometry teacher never taught us. Then I shuffled those bits of papers, clicked their first and last picture and carefully transferred them into the bin.

Tomorrow is another day and the beginning of a new week....

Trip to Bihar-land

2009-03-04T04:45:00.006+05:30

One more long awaited journey is over. And I should stress on the fact that this was one of the best trips I have had in near future. Firstly, it was a friend's wedding. Secondly, the venue was my long-lost-land, the place of my birth and incidentally the city where I earned my first degree. Thirdly, accompanying me was my buddy and 3 other friends. Every moment was fun.

One of the highlight of the trip was the train journey. The onward journey was really interesting with 'interesting co-passengers'. I think I will have to write a separate post dedicated to the Mumbai to Patna journey. What say buddy? :)

The first sunset i managed to catch on my camera

Buddy, clicking pictures from train

I love railway tracks :)

Never had i felt this kind of attachment to Patna. I was super-excited when we crossed my college. I showed my friends the usual hangouts around the college, the card gallery, the pastry-corner, the 'gunda-college'. We visited my grandparent's home and met Uncles and Aunties and cousins. So much has changed in last 10 years and still so much felt the same. Some memories I would rather forget, some which I cherish...

The only decent pic of mine i could find

The bride and the groom-'Picture perfect'

Aankhon ki gustakhiyaan...maaf ho

2009-02-21T05:48:00.003+05:30

Lovely song. There is something very sweet about the way the lovers are communicating by 'using the eyes only' in the midst of a big family function.

Why I remembered this song today is far from the reason for loving it. I have got an irritating eye infection which might be allergic or viral and it is supposed to be contagious. I am scared that I might transmit it to other unsuspecting people around me. My buddy's eye was aching this evening. Of all people, I don't want to give it to her. So, I am trying to stay away from humans for the sake of humanity. :)

In case I do manage to pass the virus to somebody, please accept my sincere apology. And enjoy this song which talks about other kind of 'gustakhiyaan' of the 'aankhen'.

Almost Single

2009-02-20T23:52:00.002+05:30

That is the book I recently read and not my current 'relationship-status'. For the latter, I will have to replace 'almost' with 'completely'. :)

Though the tone of the book is comic it deals with a serious problem of dearth of eligible men for thirty-something-working-women-in-metros. Trust me it is a serious problem. Advaita Kala successfully weaves a believable story of 3 such women and characters around them, at work and at home.

The first fifty pages seemed like just any Mills & Boon story. I have read 2 and a half and another half of MB to know this. The girl, single and ready to mingle. Enter the guy, rich, snob, and mysterious. The chemistry begins with a kind of discomfort and then leads to an inexplanable attraction. Surprisingly at the moment I was wondering why the author has written an MB in an indian context, she apologised for the turn of events in the main protagonist's life for being very Mills and Boon-ish. I liked that.

Other characters in the book have similarities to people most of us would have known or heard of at some point of time in our lives. A mother who does not approve of her daughter's lifestyle and has ready-to-give tips to the daughter for how to behave and what to wear when meeting a prospective groom's mom. A cousin who is not happy or satisfied with her marriage but is sticking to it since she does not have enough courage to give it all up and move out. A nosey neighbour who is very interested in knowing what is happening in the single-working-woman's adjacent flat. The curiosity reaches a peak when the frequent visitors are her guy friends. Another interesting character is that of another woman who is a potential danger as far as the love interest of the main protagonist is concerned. What adds to the spice is the ability of Ms Aisha Bhatia, the main protagonist, to land in all sort of embarrassing situations when either the guy or his mom are around.

The book is a fun read. It won't give you lessons on life but you will enjoy reading it at least. Near the end when Aisha becomes more introspective she shares some of her thoughts with the readers. I liked quite a few of them. My favourite one is how the desire to love rules over the desire to be loved and that it makes us feel 'emotionally-employed'. A nice way to give some reasoning to the foolishness done while being in love.

Few pics of 14th evening :)

2009-02-16T19:44:00.004+05:30

Pictures: Courtesy Suman K. Guha.

Thanks a lot Suman :)

My best Valentine's Day ever....

2009-02-16T04:08:00.007+05:30

It is not that I believe in a 'special day' dedicated to love. I am basically a romantic at heart so any or every day is fine by me. But this year it was different. I got to see my latest 'crush' or 'heart-throb' or whatever you may call it.

Its him...

...and unfortunately there were just too many (way more than too many, actually) people around, so I could not grab all his attention. Its ok...I can live with this. I was telling my friend about this latest development and I asked her if it was abnormal that I am getting such 'teenage-type-crushes' at this age and she confidently told me that it is completely 'normal'. So, I am happy... :)

The Shankar-Ehsaan-Loy Concert at the Kala Ghoda Festival was really good. It was the first time I attended an event like this and I enjoyed a lot. My buddy had told me 10 days back that Farhan Akhtar is going to perform Live this year. She read it somewhere and then we could not relocate the source. So we concluded that it must have been a mistake. And on 14th evening I was not prepared for the 'surprise-item' of the evening. It was a treat. Since last 10 days (jab se Farhan Akhtar ka bukhaar chadha hai) everybody around me has been making fun of me (or is sick of me) when I sing or play the "Meri laundry ka ek bill" song. Actually I had not seen Rock On till last night and the first movie of his that I saw was "Luck By Chance" and that led me back to Rock On and its music. Rock On is not a great movie. There are too many inconsistencies and failures in the movie. But I like the songs specially the one mentioned above and also "Socha hai", "Sinbad", "Tum ho to" and the title track.

Going back to the concert, the song which I liked the most was "Mitwa" from Kal Ho Na Ho. And the second best was "Ma" from Taare Zameen Par. While listening to the latter I didn't realize when I started crying. There are a few songs which help me release any form of suppressed or sub-conscious sadness. This is one of them. If I don't cry while listening to this song that means that I am doing fine. Interesting 'weep-o-meter'. But this time I didn't cry because i was disturbed by something else. Shankar sang it really well and with a lot of feel. I just connected to it. I really had a nice time this 14th Feb. Will remember this evening...

Devender, Parminder and Chanda

2009-02-09T01:06:00.004+05:30

After watching Dev D. my blood-movie level is going to be high for a long time. It had been a long time since I saw a movie which does not take the viewer's intelligence for granted. I loved this one. I was a little apprehensive before watching it since the media was calling it "a sexed-up version of the original Devdas". But I sat through it without flinching even once.

Replace 'love' with 'lust'/'sex' and rest of the story is same (almost). And this new version is more easy to understand. This time the reason for the separation of Dev and Paro is not family or the rich-and-poor-divide but the ego clash between the male and the female sexuality. If the male does it, it bears no significance but if the female loses it, she is a 'slut'. When Dev realises that there was more to his relation with Paro, she is married and happy. The late realization drives him to self-destruction. He meets Chanda/Lenny, a russian hooker. He hates her and she falls in love with him. And then a small deviation from the original, which I loved.

The overall look of the movie is so impressive that it is apparent that a lot of thought has been put into each and every nuance. There were a few things which I did not understand completely, but in order to move with the movie i overlooked those. The cinematography and the background art and decor was appropriate without being loud. And the music was great. I love Emotional atyachaar (the crowd went mad when the brass band version began), Pardesi, Duniya and Paayalia. The last one is my favourite and it is picturised on my favourite character in the movie.

The scene I liked most in the movie was when Dev hugs Chanda and says "Koi baat nahi beta. Jo ho gaya use bhool jaao." There was a lot of warmth in the way he says this. Another scene which I liked was when Paro visits Dev when she learns that he is in town. And the first thing she does is asking him to take bath and change clothes. Then she cleans up the mess (pig-pen) he had been living in. In this one incident the director tries to show that the 'lust' was accompanied by 'love' in Dev-Paro relation. How this scene ends is a different story though...

While watching the credits of the movie I noticed that the concept of Dev D. was Abhay Deol's. Kudos to both the 'best' Deol around and Anurag Kashyap. I would like to see a joint venture between them and Aamir Khan.

Last week...

2009-02-04T00:21:00.005+05:30

Last week was near perfect. 2 movies. Dance class thrice in the week. Dinner at a friend's place. Visit from another dear friend. A new technique which seemed to have worked in my hands. And an improvement in my sleep-wake schedule.

Since the day I have returned from Pune, my whole routine is changed. I have started sleeping early and getting up early too. I am feeling good about it and hope to retain this habit. The only thing I am missing because of this is blogging. Mostly I used to write my posts late night or early morning while struggling to fall asleep. But now, sleep comes uninvited around 10:30-11:00 and I am dead by 12. Tonight is an exception, so i decided to write this post.

Saw two movies last week. Luck by chance and Slumdog Millionare. I didn't like the latter. Will write about it in the next post. As far as the former is concerned, I am in love with Farhan Akhtar. The movie is not great but I really like the guy. I have still not seen Rock On. Will do that when i get some time.

Another thing which made me happy last week was that after struggling 2-3 times I managed to make upma finally. I love upma and now I can make it myself. The picture below proves it. Just that it was a little too salty, so I have to adjust that from next time onwards.

Now the reason why I am still awake tonight. My throat has been paining on and off for the past one week and I tried my best to control it by gargling etc. Now it is out of control and looks like a full-fledged infection and I am down with fever and body ache. I hate it :(

All good things are followed by not so good ones and vice versa.

Getaway

2009-01-27T09:01:00.010+05:30

Goli maar bheje mein...

***Sparkle***

Hum aur Tum

Ek tha thoonth

Aaj khush to bahot hoge tum...

K2 did you tell me about this?

Guess who was there too... :)

Morning...

2009-01-23T08:46:00.003+05:30

Woke up very early today. Finally I made up on all the sleep deficit that had accumulated over the past few days. It has been a long time since I wrote something on my blog. I was busy with the presentation which didn't go well. And after it got over I was left with many thoughts which I wanted to sort out myself. I know what went wrong from my side and what needs more attention. I will work on it. Learning from my mistakes...but I haven't learnt how not to make mistakes.

Picture courtesy: Senthil

I have climbed this far and so I will manage to cross the next few steps and the hurdles that come in the way.

There were so many things which came in my mind in the last 2 weeks and I made a mental note that I would write about it here, but now I have forgotten most of them. Also, I have not seen a movie for a long time. My "to watch" list includes Slumdog Millionare, DevD and Luck by Chance. Just came to know that Luck by Chance has Aamir Khan in a cameo. More reason for me to hit the theatres now. And more things to look forward to :)

Time Machine

2009-01-07T03:42:00.009+05:30

An old friend is in town. I have been excited since the day I came to know that she will be visiting Bombay. It is always fun to be back with old friends. In the 7-8 hours that three of us spent together today, we did everything from sharing updates in our lives to exchanging gossip stories. Actually I didn't have any gossip stories, instead I was just listening most of the time.

There are few friends who are both elder and wiser than me... This one fits that criteria :)

After spending five and a half year at the same institute for finishing this degree, obviously I hardly have any of my seniors around. Even many of my batch mates have left the place. And currently I am one of the seniors in the department. So I am bound to be excited when one of my seniors is here. I have been jumping around and telling all that "Didi is here" :). After such a long time I am getting a chance to behave like a kid and now with her around I can even throw a tantrum. It is not that I don't make a fool of myself in front of the junior bachchas in the department. But still...this is different. And it feels so good....

....as if I laid my hands on a time machine and i am back in the good old days when i was in my first year.

Idiosyncratic me

2009-01-05T03:08:00.004+05:30

Avoiding people when I am in a bad mood is not a new phenomenon for me. I have been doing this for quite sometime. I can feel that it is worsening and my tolerance for people is decreasing. At such moments I just try to stay alone. I don't want to get irritated and scream at people just because I am not in the best mood.

These days, I would say that I am in a contemplative mood and not actually in a bad mood. Too many things on my mind and then there is a major presentation to give in 2 weeks. So, I am just trying to keep myself away from anything which might irritate me.

I was just thinking that with every passing day I am becoming less and less adaptable. I mean I am living alone and have become accustomed to this situation. I don't have any other responsibility apart from my own. I make my own plans. If one of my experiment is coming in the way of an outing, i just manipulate my work somehow and take time out for the outing. Nobody is there who can ask me to change my plans according to him/her. I don't need another living being to go shopping for anything under the sun. I go for movies and plays alone. I have gone out for dinner alone. I don't mind roaming on the streets alone.

Because of all this I find it very difficult when at rare occassions I have to change my plan because of anybody else. I know it is bad in the long run. Can't help...

However, owing to the selfish human nature, I often crave for another person by my side when I am in self-doubt, when I am stressed, when I am sad... But that person cannot be just anybody. I feel the need of a special person then... A friend cannot take that place.

2 weeks to go...

2009-01-04T05:46:00.003+05:30

Nothing is coming in its way now.

I cleaned up my room (more importantly my fan) and now the environment is conducive for me to sit and study and speculate. All the clutter is also gone (or hidden). I just need to concentrate and study now. I will do it...

Another thing which was pending was the review for Ghajini. I finished writing that too (see below). Now my mind is free for other more important things.

Also, my mood is a little better now. After last week's failed experiment I was feeling so low. I didn't do anything except deciding what reagents and other materials are required to make this experiment a success. The cheapest and best option costs Rs. 30,000 only. Prepared the indent and kept it on boss's table with shaking hands, praying that she doesnt scream at me and blame me for the failed experiment. Like most of the time, she didn't say anything, just signed the paper and gave it to me. That was the war I won yesterday. I felt like a school kid trying to get the parent's signature on the report card after failing in all the subjects.

No matter how much we grow up... there are enough happenings which keep us reminding of all the bad things in life.

Ghajini

2009-01-02T02:41:00.005+05:30

Finally I am writing about the movie I waited for so long. It took so much time because I was searching for a decent photograph of my hero :). Of course that's not the case. First of all I managed to watch the movie on 25th itself. How that happened is a very big story which i am not going to write here but it was a big adventure in a strange city. Had i been in Bombay, I would have watched the preview on 24th. So, my record didn't break. Just that instead of first show, I saw the second show of the movie.

The peak of joy was getting the tickets and then with every scene the joy diminished. :(

If Aamir Khan accepts a movie, there is a certain kind of expectation from it. This one was completely disappointing. It is a complete 'masala-movie' for the regular brainless-movie-goer. Why did he do this? It is not that the Tamil version was so great that he got tempted to do the remake.

No point talking about the story here. I think everybody knows this "revenge saga of a man suffering from anterograde amnesia". Instead I will talk about the highs and lows of Ghajini.

Is that just short-term-memory loss?: The gestures of the main protagonist Mr Sanjay Singhania after the accident suggest that apart from the special kind of memory loss he also suffers from some kind of psychotic disorder. In certain scenes he looks more menacing than Ghajini himself who looks like a sadak-chhaap-gunda.

The MD of Airvoice Mobile Company and his love-story : This is the only part of the movie which I kind of enjoyed. It had both comedy and romance. The love story was a bit unusual but compared to the other blunders in the movie it seems believable. Mr Singhania was truly a hard working businessman. He managed his work and his love life quite well. And to switch between the roles of the billionare and the common man, he just needed to take off his coat and travel by an auto. But he forgets to relevant things like carrying cash and ends up offering his credit card to a paani-puri waala.

This part is very similar to the first half of Jab We Met, in which the dejected with life and dumped by girl friend business tycoon meets a chirpy, bubbly girl from a humble background who lives life on her own terms and takes joy in small things. The guy gets transformed, in other words more human. The same happens to Mr Singhania, who after falling in love with Kalpana lets himself loose and gives way to all his repressed emotions in the form of 6 different hairstyles in the Behka song.

The role of Police: The only hard-working and responsible police officer gets killed early in the movie. The guy manages to catch the murderer within a day or two after getting some tips from an observant bus conductor. Unfortunately the transformed gym-goer Mr Singhania manage to break free and pack Mr Police Officer in a cupboard in his Hiranandani flat. Later Mr Officer is rescued by Ms Sunita, a curious medical student. What happens next is the most believable scene in the movie for which I would like to congratulate Mr Murugados. The first thing Mr Officer does after being released is drink loads of water reiterating the fact that he is a normal human being.

Later in the movie we see that the police is completely absent from the site of action. They didn't want to get involved in this complicated revenge saga. Neither do they investigate or manage to catch Kalpana's killers nor do they look for Mr. Ghajini's killer as we clearly see Mr Singhania sitting peacefully on a chair, gazing at the mountains from Aamir Khan's Panchgani home at the end of the movie.

3 things that need to be explained:

1) Why did the police officer run away when suddenly Sanjay Singhania returns to his flat?

2) Why did Ghajini and his bunch of goons suddenly come to the basement parking area when the former was supposed to be attending the college program? The Lattoo song was being played in the background when the action was taking place in the basement. So all this must have happened within the span of 5-10 minutes.

3) How come Sanjay Singhania's doctors, lawyers and manager failed to see the scribbles on the walls of Singhania's flat when they get the unconcsious Singhania from the police station to the flat?

Inspite of all this I did like a few scenes from the movie. And they are...

The song "Kaise mujhe tum mil gayin..." is well picturised. As always Aamir Khan performs best without even saying a word. Whatever he is thinking can be read from his face and his eyes. The way he says "Kya tum bhi..." before departing from Kalpana is so reassuring that he is there for the woman he loves and there is nothing to be scared of.

The idea of the foot imprints on the cement was really cute. I would like to do something like that, some day :)

Asin acted well in the whole sequence when she is hiding from the killers, then makes frantic calls to Sanjay and then prays that he doesn't leave when the doorbell is not answered by her till she gets killed in that brutal manner. The scene shook me.

The scene in the climax when Sanjay is about to take the revenge on Ghajini. He is reminded of the day when Kalpana was killed. He is weeping and looking for an appropriate tool to kill Ghajini with. He rejects some after giving a thought. It looks as if he wants to inflict maximum pain in the process of killing and the best way to avenge Kalpana's death was to kill Ghajini in the same manner. For me that is the best scene of the movie as far as my hero's acting is concerned.

The year-long wait got over. And another begins... Waiting for Kiran Rao's Dhobi Ghat and Raju Hirani's 3 Idiots.

Let thy love play upon my voice...

2008-12-31T22:23:00.005+05:30

Let thy love play upon my voice,
and rest on my silence.
Let it pass through my heart into all my movements.
Let it shine like stars shine in the darkness of my sleep,
and dawn in my awakening.
Let thy love...

This was my favourite hymn in school. The composition which we were taught by Sister Coletta was very "happiness inducing". I still sing it when I am feeling low. Reminds me of old days and also cheers me up.

The year is coming to an end.

Last year at the same time I was wishing for all the negativities to disappear from my life in the new year. After a bad 2007, I so wished for a change. 2008 provided no respite. Neither on personal front nor in general.

This is Moshe, son of the Rabbi who was killed at Nariman house during the terror attacks. He is just one of the orphans created by the acts of terrorism in the last year. The more I think about it, the more it disturbs me.

Those who are indulging in such violent acts in the name of God or religion, have never known God. I just pray that these people get to feel the love of God and love for God and fellow beings. And I sing this hymn once again. Let thy love play upon my voice...

My 100th post :)

2008-12-20T23:25:00.000+05:30

I had been waiting for long to write this special post. However, I had not decided what will be the content of this post. I wanted to write something which I have not written before. But then I didn't get enough time to put in more thought. So, I decided to write about my blog on my blog.

I came to know about blogging from my friend K2. She was a regular blogger and I loved reading her. One day I was remembering another friend of mine who is no more amongst us and I decided to express my thoughts in words and the result was this post. My second post was about the first love story of my life. Then I started writing about a subject which I love the most-"Movies". I am a complete movie-buff and all those around me can vouch for this fact. The first movie review i wrote was for 'Kabhi Alvida Na Kehna'. It became the most popular post on my blog but I deleted it sometime earlier this year. With the post all the 'fantastic' comments were also lost. I regret doing that now.

I stopped blogging for quite a while in between and then i came back in Mar 2007 and since then I have been regular, with at least 1 post every month (I have improved that to 3 posts a week now).

I was reading my older posts (i didn't know it would be so much fun) and realized that more or less I have been writing about the same subjects which are:

Movies
Books
Friends and Family
Random thoughts (happy)
Random thoughts (sad)
Some posts with 'hidden meanings' :)

My favourite posts (one from each of the above category) would be:

Movie related: Lamhon ki guzarish hai ye (song), My fav songs

Book Review: Kite Runner

Friends and Family: Bachpan

Random thoughts (happy): I want to be free, My room, Smile

Random thoughts (sad): Mumbai, It

The one with 'symbolism': What do I do?, Umbrella

This post has turned out to be a "review" of the past 2 years. I wanted to compile some of my favourite posts somewhere, so this post serves that purpose too.

In the coming year I don't know how much time I will be able to devote to my blog. If my enthusiasm and an urge to write and express stays with me I will try to reach the 300th post mark in 2009. Lets see :)

As life and times have changed drastically in the last 2 years, so have been my thoughts. The frequency of writing has increased several fold because this space is taking the place of a friend for me. If something strikes me or makes me very happy or very sad I start thinking about how i will express it here. I do have my buddy and other friends here, but still I like to express it here. It gives me a different kind of satisfaction. I intend to keep on writing...and as pointed out by another friend of mine, I will try to think and write "positively".

Thanks to all my friends who follow this blog and all those random readers who drop in every now and then. Keep on commenting... :)

Finally...

2008-12-19T06:03:00.000+05:30

Finally there is something which i am beginning to like about Ghajini. It's the song "Kaise mujhe tum mil gayin, qismat pe aaye na yaqeen..."

The lyrics are not great but the tune is very sweet and has a certain kind of calmness. And the picturization seems to be good. It shows Aamir Khan in a pensive mood, going away from Asin (no idea about the situation), he first takes an auto, then is seen in a car, getting down at the international airport and then is seen sitting in a chartered plane which finally the takes off.... It reminds me of the similar scene in the "Tanhaai" song from Dil Chahta Hai.

The way things are moving, mostly I won't be able to watch the first show of Ghajini. Will try to catch the movie on the first day or the latest by the first week :(. My record of several years is going to break... :(

Picture courtesy: aamirkhan.com

Is "Marriage" over-rated?

2008-12-18T03:02:00.000+05:30

http://www.johnclearygallery.com/pics/smith/couple.jpg

The other day I was talking to a friend of mine and the topic of discussion changed to "Marriage". This friend of mine is very different from me and he often introduces me to alternative perspectives. The good thing about him is that he doesn't impose his point of view on me (sometimes he does that with other people though). We talk peacefully, he speaks his mind and I speak mine.

I was telling him how much I am scared of getting married to a 'wrong' kind of person. By wrong I meant a person with a personality conflicting to mine. e.g. I like movies and he is a movie-hater. I like to be organized and keep my workplace and home clean and he turns out to be a person enjoying the mess around him. There can be different kinds of mismatches on different levels of personality and I won't name them here. I can't live with and share my life with a person who is so different from me. Actually "different" is not the correct word, "conflicting" is what i mean. I can live and love a person who is very different from me till he doesn't try to change me in order to accept his way of life.

http://www.pedrohubert.com/images/UnhappyCoupleG_468x344.jpg

In reply to my worries he said that it doesn't matter at all if you don't connect to your life partner. A bad marriage is not the end of the world. They can still remain happy in their respective worlds, which might include their respective jobs, friend circle and other interests in life.

I think he was talking about an ideal world. I don't think this is possible in the current Indian social system. And may be it is possible for guys, but for a married woman everything is different.

As far as I am concerned I will certainly not be happy in such a situation. I can live with a bad room-mate thinking that she is just a room-mate and that I don't have to live with her forever. But I can't think this way for my life partner. I firmly feel that a marriage can make or break a person. I disagree with my friend.

The End of Innocence by Moni Mohsin

2008-12-18T00:04:00.000+05:30

The End of Innocence is not an extraordinary story but it is worth a read. One of the negative points of this book is its similarity to Bapsi Sidhwa's Ice Candy Man. I have not read Sidhwa's book, however I have seen 1947-Earth which is based on it.

The theme of both the books is similar. A child sharing space with the adults and trying to understand the world of grown-ups. In the End of Innocence Laila is the 9 year old girl who reads Enid Blyton and wants to 'solve a mystery' like the Five Find-outers. She has dreams of a child but wants to grow-up fast so that she can talk like one of the adults around her. She finds a friend in Rani, who is 6 years older than her. Rani, a teenager, has a different world. She dreams of falling in love and getting married. She shares her feelings with Laila who is too young to understand it wholly but still she acts like a good listener and poses to be excited in front of Rani. But the truth is that she does not understand the gravity of the situation and one day she innocently shares Rani's secret with the wrong person and Rani is lost forever. What Laila gets in return is a guilt for life.

Moni Mohsin describes Laila and her world beautifully. Laila is the most comprehensively sketched character of this novel. That makes me wonder whether the book is partially autobiographical. Autobiography or not, the story and the characters are believable. One of the sub-plots of the book which I really liked was the relationship between the husband and wife, Tariq and Fareeda, Laila's parents. They were the perfect couple, truly made for each other. Their love story runs throughout the book, though in the background.

Overall I liked the book but there was nothing which specifically moved me. Somehow it failed to touch my heart.

I am wondering which book should I pick up next. I think I will read some non-fiction now just to change the taste. :)